Beautiful things - jaylor story (peace book 4)

bad communication

** Tuesday february 26th, 2036**

-taylors Pov-

I wake up when I hear gagging and shot up from my spot on the couch and run over to Kenzie who start throwing up into a bag. I hold her hair back and rub her back while she lets it all out. I wish there were something more I could do, but right now, all I can do is be there with her. "it's okay baby girl, mommy is here. Get it all out" I tell her.

A nurse come in that's going to take her blood but sees what is happening and comes with more of those disposable bags with the plastic ring that holds them open so it's easier to not have the content of your stomach all over the bed.

Kenzie finishes throwing up and the nurse has a washcloth to wipe her mouth and we give her some water to rinse her mouth from the acid. "I was just coming to take your blood, but I see you have an upset tummy Kenzie. I'm sorry to hear that" she says and caress her head.

The nurses here have been Wonderful with Kenzie, they take their time to talk to her and explain things. A child life specialist has also come in a couple of times to chat and see what they can help with.

"How about I message the doctor and ask for some anti-nausea medicine so your stomach will hopefully settle a bit" she suggests, and we agree. Her NG tube thankfully stayed in place this time, it didn't a few days ago and they had to put in a new one. Sadly, she isn't able to eat enough on her own right now, she snacks and take little bites but don't have an appetite.

The nurse starts to take her blood "I'm going to check if your blood is doing okay. You look a little pale so it's important to check to see that you're handling the medicine well. Isn't it cool that you have a device in your chest that means we don't need to poke you all the time" she says.

"yes, I don't like needles" Kenzie says and I hold back a laugh, like mother like daughter. I've always hated needles too and every time I have to have my blood taken, I make Joe go with me and hold my hand. I might be 46 years old, but I'm still terrified of needles. "so I like the thing because that means less poking. It looks weird though, I can see it in the mirror" she observes.

It's placed over her right boob on her chest under her skin. I was nervous about having it placed because the tubing ends right over her heart, but I see how well its working for her, and it means less needles.

"am i getting the chemo thing today too" Kenzie asks as the nurse finishes with her port and have taken everything she needs. "yes, I'm coming back in a little bit after the doctor has rounded on you and we are going to give you some chemo, some fluids and start the NG feeds for the day" she tells Kenzie.

We have done it, so she isn't really hocked up to stuff at night unless she absolutely has to be hocked up to something. It's easier for her to sleep if she doesn't have to worry about pulling on a wire or something like that.

The nurse leaves again and Kenzie scoots to the side of her bed "mommy come here" she says, and I chuckle before climbing into bed with her and letting her snuggle in my side. "When will my hair be gone" she asks, and I sigh. "I don't know exactly, but they said it might take around two weeks until it's fallen off. But I think that today me and you will go online and look at cute hats so we can keep your head warm" I suggests.

I'm trying hard to keep her spirits up but it's hard. Before she can say anything, Joe comes into the room and Kenzie smiles "dad" Joe comes over and kiss her forehead "hi Kenzie. Did you have a good sleep?"

Kenzie scrunch her nose "I woke up because I had to throw up, that hurts. So now I'm getting cuddles and then we are going to look at hats online"

Joe takes a chair and pull it up to the side of her bed. He hasn't even addressed me; we just shared a look that lasted two seconds. There is an elephant in the room between us, but I just don't know where to start or where we would get the time to speak at all. This type of silence is something we haven't been through before, its usually not an issue for us, but here we are. I think we both have things we want to say but neither one of us is able to communicate it.