Harry Styles Oneshots // english

A Duet Sung By Himself

I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself not to let the tears gathered in my eyes spill over. He'd promised me. A hiss left my mouth at the memory of him even rolling his eyes when i'd made him give me his word a second time, as if i were being completely ridiculous for doubting him. But of cours i'd been right to do so, even thought it was for nothing. Because he wasn't here. And he hadn't been here when i would've needed him to be either.
The dress i'd put on had long been traded for a shirt and my face washed and cleaned from any make up. After, i'd climbed into bed and nestled down, for the first time loathing how much the bed an dpillows smelled of Harry.
I hadn't asked for much, either. Only to be home by seven pm and to accompany me to a dinner my friend had organized, like any other occasionally did.
I kept wondering if he even cared for how much he disappointed me. He most likely didn't, or else my phone wouldn't be as empty of messages or calls from him as it was.
My fingers angrily brushed at my cheeks and i gave in to the tears, allowing sobs to wreck through my body. Ugly sniffles and cries filled the room and i would've been embarrassed by it, of my pain and anger wouldn't have taken up all the space any other emotions.

All those perfect moments with Harry, where he swore his love for me and that he wished for us to never be apart, seemed to mean so little every time he let me wait up for him, with no word of where he was. How could he truly mean it when he said he wanted me always, when i was so easily pushed to the side once someone else offered their time to him.

I was too caught up in letting myself drown in my feelings so i didn't hear him enter the house or walking up the stairs. A heavy knock on the door made me flinch and bit down on my pillow, trying and failing to quieten my sobs. Oh, please go away.

"Y/n, my love, i am so sorry."

The mere sound of his lovely, raspy voice had another wave of tears running down my face and i shook my head, One dinner. For the first in months, i'd asked him to do something for me, and he'd let me down.
I whimpered when the door handle rattled and Harry sighed, realizing that it wouldn't open to him.

"You locked me out of our room?"

MY heart ached at the evident pain in his voice. We'd fought before and often quite loudly, but never had either of us refused to let the other sleep in the bed. No matter how angry or upset we were, the night would be spend by each other's side, even if the touching was kept to a monimal. This made having arguments with Harry less frightening and gave them a silver lining to look forward to. But this time, i couldn't bear to have him in bed with me.

"Yes."

A thumb came from the door and i could imagine him resting his forhead against the wood in exhaustion. His eyes squeezed closed and his hair a mess from pulling at the soft strands in distress.
It was, after all, two am and he'd left the house at eight in the morning.

"Y/n," Harry whined, "Don't wanna sleep on the couch, baby. Please, don't make me, c'mon."

My hands fisted the bedsheets and i pulled them up to my chin.

"Go away, Harry."

The door handle rattled again, even though he knew that it was for nothing. I wasn't going to unlock the door no matter how big of a scene he'd start to make. Still, i hoped that he woul leave me be, that he'd somehow sense how i couldn't take an argument right now.

"You're crying. M'not gonna go anywhere 'til i got to make it better," Harry's soft voice hummed.

My arms ached to be holding my boyfriend's body and to feel his warmth. I sighed at how much it hurt to have pain inflicted by a person you love and ironically, said person being the only one who could lessen it.

"You can't make anything better anymore, Harry. You already missed dinner!" i called, the words strained and my voice broken from all the crying.

My vocal cords were sore and i heard Harry's sigh through the door. A soft knock followed, so soft actually, i'd almost missed it. He knew he was in trouble.

"Y/N," he spoke, "I'm begging you. You're hurt and i understand, baby, but we cannot move past this if you don't let me into this room tonight. It'll all build up and get worse, you know i'm right."

Yeah it would build up and get worse, i wasn't an idiot. But seeing his face while hearing his excuses just wasn't whatcould've changed anything to the better at the moment. I already was embarrassed and nothing he'd say would make it better. They seemed so meaningless to me now anyway and i couldn't deal with them, not when his clear green eyes got teary, his brown hair framing his lovely face and his pink lips bitten and swollen. A sight that would always break my heart and make me open my arms to welcome him.
He'd messed up and i wasn't going to just forget about it, for the sake of saving him from feeling guilty.

Another knock.

"Baby."

I didn't reply. Silence settled between us and i already believed he'd left when he spoke up again, or rather: he sang.

"You know the world can see us. In a way that's different than who we are."

My teeth pulled at my bottom lip and i rolled my eyes. Leave it to Haeey for taking me not seriously. What's new?

"S'your turn," Harry encouraged and i shook my head. He continued: "Creating between us 'til we're seperate hearts. But your faith it gives me strength. Strength to believe.... Oh Y/n, we're breaking free. We're soaring, flying. My love, there's not a star in heaven , that we can't reach..."

My feet landed on the cold tile wooded floor as i pushed myself out of bed. I angrily unlocked the door and pulled it open, meeting Harry with tears in my eyes and surprise in his.

"If we're trying, yeah we're breaking free. Can you feel it building, like a wave the ocean just can't control-"

"Shut up," i spat.

"Wrong line, babe," Harry commented with a grin on his lips, but it faded once he noticed the tears on my flushed cheeks.

His expression fell and lips parted, I raised my eyebrows and tilted my head.

"Not so funny anymore now, is it?"

Harry's adam-apple moved visibly when he swallowed hard. "Y/n, i'm sorry. Let me expla-"

"No."

He nodded and held up both hands. "Right. You're hurt and i-"

"Do you have any idea how much you embarrassed me today," i asked, interrupting him once more, "How disappointed i am with you? No, of course you don't. Because Harry Styles thinks of many people and pleases all of them, but putting his girlfriend first for once? God no."

My voice hurt and so did my head. Both of my eyes ached with how tired i was. All in all, i had wuite obviously, no nerves for his jokes.

"Y/n," Harry began and stepped closer so he could lean in a bit. His smell took over my senses and made me feel dizzy. "You'll understand once you let me-"

"Will i? 'Cause i doubt it, as you can't even comprehend how serious i am with this! You come home at 2 am and start quoting some Disney song, thinking i'd easily sing along and fall into bed with you later! Forget it!"

The anger cursing through my veins kept me from getting weak knees at how soft his pink lips looked as he bit it and how his green eyes sparkled with worry and regret. I could ignore how much my body ached to have him near.
Finally, Harry didn't say anything anymore, not even when i slammed the door in his face. I'd forgive him eventually, of course i would. Harry and i loved each other more than anything. However, maybe sleeping on the couch for the first time in our one year relationship, would make him realize that he couldn't take me for granted. And i was sure he knew it too, as he didn't try to reopen the door again that night, even though i'd left it unlocked.