Holding onto Forever

Ross you...

I woke up from a scream, I quickly sat up and looked beside me. Skylar was gone... I jumped up and checked around my room, I opened the door and peeked out it.

"Sky? Babe?" I looked around to see the bathroom door shut, I quietly tiptoed over to the door and listened. For a moment it was silent until I heard Skylar sobbing on the other side. I quickly tiptoed back to my room but bumped into Ryland.

"hey? what's going on? I heard a-" Ryland began but I shushed him. I pointed towards the bathroom door.

"it's Sky, just go back to bed. I got it under control." I told him, he nodded and dragged his feet back to bed. I quickly took a blanket from my room and walked back to the bathroom door, I knocked twice.

"baby? it's me, may I please come in?" I asked her quietly.

"... no." she whispered.

"why not?" 

"b-because... I-I don't want you s-seeing me l-like this." she stuttered.

"I've seen you cry before baby, please let me i-" I stopped and thought for a moment, was she? oh no... "Skylar are y-you cutting?" she began sobbing even more. "listen to me baby, please let me in. I can help you! please just stop hurting yourself!" I begged. It went silent again, I heard shuffling then the door unlocked.

"wait." she told me, I did what she said. once I heard it get quiet again I slowly opened the door. The light was off so it was pretty dark, I quickly shut the door behind me and locked it. I looked around the room to see Skylar sitting in the corner of the bathroom in a ball. I flicked on the small lamp my mom kept in the bathroom and looked over toward Skylar. I saw her press the razor into her skin and drag it up arm, I gasped and ran over to her. "Baby no! Don't do that!" I almost yelled as I took the razor away from her and threw it across the room, She was crying and covering her face. I gripped her arm tightly trying to stop the blood, I quickly reached over and grabbed a towel then pressed it on her arm. She gasped at the pain and sat up.

"how... how could you hurt yourself like this?" I sighed and looked into her eyes, she looked down and tried hiding her face. "no look at me!" I raised her head with my index finger making her look at me.

"I-I'm so sorry Ross... I didn't mean to make you angry..." I watched as a single tear fell down her cheek.

"hey, hey. You didn't make me angry...' I stopped and looked at her, more tears rushed down her face. 'baby come here!" I moved closer to her and wrapped my arm tightly around her waist. She moved closer to me and gripped onto my shirt. I let go of her arm and held her in my arms, I moved one hand and wiped away her tears then just simply lightly rubbed my thumb back and fourth trying to soothe her. 

"R-Ross." she cried and hid her face in the crook of my neck.

"hey shh. calm down baby it's okay shh." I rubbed her back. "just try and calm down." I felt tears sting my eyes, but I couldn't cry. I needed to show her that I was strong and she could come to me with anything.

"I-I know you're upset with me, and I'm so sorry." she pulled away and tried moving back into the corner.

"no baby I'm not.' I paused and rested my hand on her neck. 'I'm not upset with you, I'm just upset because you're hurting yourself. I don't want to see you hurting especially this way, It hurts seeing you hurt. Baby please stop doing this to yourself, it can kill you..." 

"I know... that's was sort of the point..." she said the wiped away her tears which were only replaced by new ones.

"no! don't ever say that again!' I whisper, yelled. "why would you want to die? baby you have me, and I have you! I can't loose you no matter what, please, please baby don't ever think of doing that again. It nearly killed both of us... I can't stand to see you do this to yourself, please stop baby please!" I kept begging.