Turn It Up

It's Nothing

Time had a funny side sometimes. And by funny, I totally mean that sometimes it is the worst of enemies. When it comes to right here, right now. It was the worst thing that Pam could possibly have. Her Fergal was gone. He was on the road and he was living life now as a RAW Superstar. She was so proud of him, the overwhelming feeling, the sensation she got when she even thought of him being a big name on the big stage was indescribable. But she couldn't help but have a nagging feeling of..dread. A nagging feeling of self loathing that she wasn't good enough to go along with him..It was a powerless feeling, she knew she was ready, she was absolutely ready. But that actually is where the problem with NXT lies. Even if you are indeed ready, and everyone around you knows it including the upper staff..If no one is there to really fill the void of your spot? You aren't going anywhere. Hence why Fergal had to stay so long. Joe had to come into his own with the NXT Universe and Shinsuke had to get his feet under him. It was a process that sped up as soon as Shinsuke arrived on the scene in WWE. But it did happen, and it killed Pam to think that she was literally one of the original people to be in NXT..Yet she was the last one standing. She sat alone in her apartment. The only thing she had by her side was a goofy little teddy bear that Fergal had given her just mere days before he hopped on a plane and went off to the next town. She looked over at it and half smiled, just before she grabbed it and pulled it into her chest, hugging it tightly. All of her friends were on the main stage, ,Lexi..Rebecca..Ashley..Fergal..Leah..This was going to be an extremely difficult..However long management would keep her here.

Pam had nothing but time, nothing but alone time with herself right now. She didn't have anyone she could really call, she didn't have anyone that she could just text and request their company. And right now? She honest to god didn't really even want anyone around her. She wasn't herself due to the fact that a huge chunk of her heart was torn out when Fergal got on that plane. She was absolutely understanding, absolutely. There was no denying that she knew this day would indeed come. But she had just..just figured that there would be a better outcome to it all. She thought that the fans had finally grasped onto her and were yanking her to where she wanted to go. Was it management that just..didn't see it? They already killed the Tenille bubble character when her debut as Emma was thwarted due to the fans not caring..But that's entirely different. The fans didn't take to her as a character, the fans ADORE Bayley. For shits sake, in London for Takeover? They were singing a song dedicated to Pam. The RAW after Wrestlemania when they were recognizing the women? What were the fans chanting? 'We want some Bayley.' They WERE ready for her, she was ready for them. But management wasn't ready for NXT to be without their heart and soul. That is the only positive way that Pam could possibly look at this. The only way that she could sit at home, and just wait patiently for what seemed like an eternity while the whole world around her keeps spinning. She felt like she was in limbo, her heart didn't even feel like it was even beating inside her chest anymore. Her blood would feel as if it was boiling with frustration, then immediately it would cool off to feel as cold as ice. She was confused with her body, she hated it. Confusion plus Pam equals not a good time. For, I say again, there is nobody that she can go to right now. At that exact moment of these thoughts racing through the poor woman's mind, she felt her phone buzz on her lap and she set the teddy bear down.

It was a new girl at NXT. Gionna Daddio AKA Liv Morgan. She admired Pam and all that she has done already for the wrestling world. It was a funny yet flattering feeling to have someone idolize you like that. It was a simple message, 'Yooo. You okay ? Wanna Hang out ? I can get pizza ?' Pam laughed quietly in her mind, for laughing out loud was something that wasn't going to happen with her current state. She simply replied, 'You always have pizza. I'd love to, but I'm a little tired tonight.' She immediately felt guilty for brushing Gionna off like that, she was just trying to be a friend and make sure that she was okay. Pam's mind was in a fuzzy, foggy state. She couldn't tell what was worth caring about anymore and it showed on her face. The extremely dark circles under her eyes were a testament to how physically, and emotionally exhausted she truly was. It was at that moment when Monday Night RAW was starting. She looked up as she saw Stephanie and Mick Foley in the ring. They were babbling about the future and all that jazz, when they..They did something, Something that basically triggered Pam so hard it was almost insanity. They made it a point to single Fergal out..And have him take center stage right at the top of the ramp..The crowd went insane, he fluffed the collar of his sleek leather jacket and it was announced that there would be a series of number one contender's fatal four way matches..With Fergal involved already. Pam was overjoyed. She was..completely caught off guard, tears built up in her little brown eyes as she silently began to cry. It was incredible to see him on television like that. Sure she could watch NXT and see him there, but that wasn't the same as live TV. Knowing at this exact moment, as she sat on her sofa in a tank top and leggings, he was in a sold out arena, spiffy leather jacket on, being the all powerful Finn..Her mind now began to play the old tricks on her yet again.