B.R.E.A.T.H.E

~Chapter 13~

-Noelle-

Lisa and Tionne drove me to the hospital to see about my mother. All these years I spent trying to distance myself from her and as soon as she told me the real deal she may not make it, I crumbled everything in me broke. I hadn't felt this way since I came back to Atlanta after escaping Jamal. I honestly don't like being this vulnerable to people or situations anymore it makes me feel weak and in a low place that I don't like to be in. Noelle! Huh, mama what happened? Sit down and I'll explain. When she was released from prison a few years back she was sick. She didn't tell me or anyone else because she didn't want to alarm or overwhelm us. Sick how mama! HPV and it turned into cervical cancer. Cervical Cancer I said looking at her. In prison when she came up with the infection they didn't treat it as they should have, and it just got worse and worse. I finally talked her into going to the doctor and that's when they told her she needed a hysterectomy.

Mama she's too young to have a hysterectomy. Baby she's 52 she's not going to have any more kids. You don't know mama I mean she could get married and want another baby. Trust me baby she's not thinking about having any more kids. What are they doing now I mean she's out of surgery right? Yeah she is but she's not doing too well, her heart is doing some funny shit and her lungs gave out as well. Can I see her! Yeah the doctor wanted you to make some decisions since you are her child. I can't make those decisions for her. Noelle you don't have a choice!

I stood to go and see her but Ti pulled me back. She looked at me and then hugged me. Noelle you will be strong through this okay. I nodded letting her know that I was listening as she said a few other things to me, when she was done she let me go we'll be here waiting on you okay. Okay. Li looked at me and it was like déjà vu to the day we were in that tree talking about her dad passing. She didn't have to saying to me because everything she needed to say was said without words.

Her room is this way mama said as I followed her down the hall. Once we got to the room she stopped and let me proceed into the room. I slowly opened the door and went into the room she was laying in the bed with all these machines hooked up to her. One for her heart another for her breathing it was honestly too much for me to handle, but I proceeded to her bedside.

Mom! She looked at me and a slight smile appeared on her face. Noe...shh don't try to speak I said lightly grabbing her hand. Mom you gotta be okay I can't lose you not like this. She nodded her head before trying to speak again; you the only thing I got left Noelle, she said in a low tone. That's not true you have family! Me and Amarah we need you! You don't need me, you have Helen. No mom we need you, we are apart you, we came from you! A single tear slipped from her eye. I spent 17 years praying to god that one day I'd be able to see my baby again. Now I got you back and he wants to take me away. He's not going to take you away mom. You just gotta be strong. It wasn't your fault mama. I let things happen that I shouldn't have let happen Noelle. I understand I do but I need you to get better you gotta fight for me please I won't lose you again!

-Tionne-

She's been back there for almost an hour and I could tell that mama was tired and needed to go home and rest that's the last thing we need is her to get sick. Li! Yeah Ti what's up? Will you take my mama home she needs to rest and not be here in this hospital? Yeah and I'll swing back by and drop off your car when you are ready to leave you can. Where you going? I got the twins and someone needs to make sure that Merci is okay. Oh yeah I forgot. It's okay you are concerned about Noelle. I am I haven't seen her that way in years Li. Don't stress yourself out okay, they'll both be fine. I really hope so. Don't stress she said hugging me. You'll be okay Titi she said as she lightly grazed her lips against my neck. It was the closet she could get to kissing me. I nodded and went over to tell my mom she was going to take her home.