Forever And Always Wolfstar Fluffy One Shots

when we fight

Tw: panic attacks, past self harm, mentions of child abuse, fighting

~3rd POV~

Sirius Black and Remus Lupin have been dating secretly for almost a year. Remus wants to come out, while Sirius is hesitant. They fight and bicker almost constantly, and the tension is so thick you couldn't even cut it with a knife.

~Remus' pov~

"Sirius why can't you just listen to me?" My voice is low and controlled, a growl present. I never raise my voice at Sirius. It scares him. 

"I am listening, Remus!"

"You're not. Your obviously not because if you were, you wouldn't push my hand off of you when we're in the hallway. Wouldn't make me go back to my own bed after you have nightmares even though I want to help you through it so James and Peter don't find out,"

Sirius has tears in his eyes, but for once I find that I really don't care. "I'm just scared, moony.." He mumbles. 

"I know you're scared. I get it. I'm scared too, but we can't hide forever. And, I know that your parents will find out. But who cares? We'll work through it like we always do,"

"It's not just that, moony. I've had a lot of girlfriends. Things could get bad for both of us," His words are barely audible. I snort. 

"Oh. My. Merlin. You're keeping us in the closet because you're afraid to upset a few girls? Wow. Yeah, okay. Come talk to me when you have your priorities sorted out." I turn to leave. 

"Remus, wait-" But I'm already at the stairs. 

Sirius doesn't follow. 

~Sirius' POV~

I take a deep breath and slide down the wall, my head on my knees. I love Remus so much, but I'm so scared. What if those girls are mean to him? What if my parents move from Crucio to Arvada Kadavra? What if Reg never speaks to me again? 

Before I know it, I'm hyperventilating and rubbing at my arms, feeling scars that are covered by a hoodie. I close my eyes tight, thoughts swirling through my head way too fast for me to understand them. 

"Sirius? Sirius!" The blurry image of James kneels in front of me. "Hey, buddy. Stay with me. Breathe," There are hands pushing my hair out of my face, accompanying James's soothing voice. I try and breathe deeper, but fail, moving a hand to grip on go James's wrist. He leads me through a couple of breathing exercises, voice soft and warm.

When I can finally breathe, James sits beside me and wraps an arm around my shoulders. I just breathe and curl up against his side. 

"What happened, Ri?" James asks gently, his hand rubbing up and down my arm soothingly. I sniffle and bury my head in his shoulder. 

"James, I'm gay." I mumble. 

Holy fuck, that felt good. 

"Mhm, and I have brown eyes,"

I look up at James with a surprised look. 

"Sorry, I thought we were saying things that were obvious," James chuckles. He ruffles my hair. "Padfoot, you're my brother, you think I can't tell when you don't like girls?" 

I smile. "Does anyone else know?"

"Nah, just me. You and Remus are dating, right?" I nod slowly. 

"How could you tell?"

"Sirius, who do you think puts up the silencing charm when you forget?"

James and I collapse into giggles. 

~That night~

I sit on the side of my bed, peering at Remus' closed curtains. Usually I would sneak into his bed right now, and we would cuddle while talking about our day. But he's mad at me.. 

So I lay down in my own bed and hug my stuffed dog, sniffling with renewed sadness. I press my face into the dogs fur, letting out barely audible sobs. I'm going to make it up to him. I have to. 

~Remus' POV~

I lay on my back. I can hear Sirius crying, and I really want to go help him, but I can't. I'm supposed to be mad. There are tears in my eyes, but I still don't go over there. 

~A week later, breakfast, Sirius' pov~

Remus reaches for my hand under the table. I let him hold my hand, his bigger, warmer hand engulfing mine. "I'm going to go something crazy." I mutter. 

"Sirius, you're always doing something crazy," Remus jokes. I look at him before climbing up on the table, accidentally stepping in some eggs but who cares. The dining hall goes quiet. I tug Remus up onto the table beside me. 

"Hey, Remus?" I say. I can feel my cheeks burning. He smiles. 

"What, Sirius?" His hands are reaching for my waist. I wrap my arms around his neck. 

"I love you," I murmur, because the rest of the school doesn't need to hear that part. 

"I love you too, babe," Remus leans down and kisses me. I kiss back, enjoying the charted territory. There are a few wolf whistles, a few slurs, and some 'aww's. Dumbledore awards 25 points to gryffindor for each of us, due to the bravery. 

I look up at my boyfriend with a grin. 

Maybe coming out wasn't such a bad idea after all.

//rewrote this because it was bad