All my life I've been scared of losing people. Of being alone. But recently that's all I've wanted to be. I feel extremely trapped being surrounded by so many people all the time, it feels claustrophobic in a sense. I just want to be at home, being antisocial and sleeping. I think I'm just too exhausted to see people.
I don't like having to answer people's questions. I don't like having to see people and put on a front that I want to see them because right now all I want to do is push everyone away and close my eyes and breathe. Maybe having a holiday will help me shake this, but I haven't felt these feelings of intense annoyance at humans in general in a while.
I don't like having to worry so much about what other people think of me. What everyone else is doing. I feel like I'd be much happier living in my own solitary world in a sense. I guess I think it's because a lot has happened in my life recently, and I don't like seeing people because it only adds to the drama.
