Anime one-shots/ requests/ drabbles (Requests are closed.)

Random Greetings to Akatsuki members (Complete crack)

This is a crack thingy that is the product of a conversation with JamesZoo and I decided to post it because I have had trouble writing lately and I didn't want to not update with something. So, yeah... I apologise for the fail that is me. I shall try to post the next proper oneshot as soon I can.

Warning: Slight innapropriate humour

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"Saso, old pal, made any new puppets recently? Come one, don't look at me like that. I'm not making you wait, I arrived 2 hours early~!"

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"Kakuzu my man, still hording money, I see. Don't forget that 20 you owe me~ What? I can always add in-ter-est~"

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"Zetsu, my favourite plant! Eat anyone nice recently? Hm, that's nice. Did you take them out for dinner first? It's always polite~"

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""Konan~ Living in the high lane, as per usual~! Still seeing Pein? Are you getting married yet? Can I expect to be a godmother anytime soon?"

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"Itachi, you awesome guy. Still trying to hide the desire to sleep with Dei, huh? Don't pretend~ I can see the smile behind that poker face~"

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"Madara, Madara. What's new with one of my favourite Uchiha? Killed anyone? World domination? Confessed your undying love to Hashirama and been ravaged against the wall? Tried a new shampoo?"

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"Kisame~ Ehe~ What's swimming? Samehada still being adorable? Become a cannibal yet? Don't look at me like that, I saw you eating sushi! Yeah, I saw it and the shark fin soup! Seriously though, love the hair~! Did you dye it?"

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"Sasuke! Yeesh~ No need to glare like that. What crawled up your arse? Or, in Karin's case, tried to make you crawl up theirs? Oooh~ The Uchiha clan will revive~! We must prepare! I shall go inform your brother, my dearest Duckass~!"

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"O-ro-chi-ma-ru~! How's my favourite snake man? Now, do I shake hands with your hand or your tongue that sees to be unable to remain in your mouth? Now, don't need to glare, your eyes are already thin enough. Wouldn't want you to walk into something now, would we?"

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"Hidan~! Why, I thought that you loved Kakuzu, so why are you complaigning about being locked in a room with him? I heard you last night! I'm sure Jashin would be delighted~ Have fun~ Supplies are in the draw~ Try not to kill eachother~!"