Youssef x nathan oneshots | heartstopper

His warmth

The sun shone through the curtains onto Youssef's face but he didn't wake. He didn't open his eyes though, he kept them shut and ignored everything around him. He laid in bed struggling. He couldn't smell fresh coffee or breakfast,  he couldn't hear the soft humming of his boyfriend. His boyfriend. Nathan. The pain of the previous night came back to him. He turned to Nathan's side of the bed to see it empty. Tears pricked his eyes. "It's all your fault" rung throughout his head. Youssef had hoped it was just a dream and that they had gone sleep holding each other in peace. But no that never happened as last night they argued until Nathan left back to his house. Youssef looked at his wrist that was littered with scars from his teen years. He felt ugly and unloveable. Was that not the reason he and Nathan argued last night. To him it was but Nathan probably knew the reason; he always knew the answer. He wanted to call Nathan and ask him why they argued but he didn't have the strength. He pushed wrist onto the bed and flinched, slowly pulling his wrist away from the mattress he saw fresh cuts. Horror was all over Youssef's face. He couldn't remember doing this all he remembered was saying all those years ago that he would never do it again. What he didn't realise was that it would be a lie. He broke down crying lying in the same spot.
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Youssef had must have fell asleep crying as he woke up to the sound of knocking at the door. Putting on a hoodie to hide the cuts he headed downstairs. He opened the door to see Nathan. His Nathan. The man who makes him happy. In a blink he was pulled into a hug. "I'm so sorry,Seff" Nathan whispered as youssef flinched from the pain in his wrists. The flinch didn't go unnoticed as Nathan pulled away to make sure he was okay. Youssef stayed quiet looking down at the floor tears in his eyes. They moved to the couch. That was when he burst out crying again. "I did it again Nathan, my arms...they're so ugly...I hate them"he chocked into Nathan's chest. Nathan pulled the hoodie off slowly shocked to see the cuts. He didn't yell. He didn't laugh. He didn't judge. He sat there and held his boyfriend protecting him from the world. After almost 30 minutes of crying all that could be heard was Youssef's heavy breathing. "Everything feels cold" he whispered with dryness to his voice. Nathan looked down at him as he spoke softly "I'll keep you warm". And that he did as he didn't leave his side at all slowly explaining there argument. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't Nathan's fault. It was just Youssef's scared self being afraid to open up. Now they realised if it's going to work they have to be patient and honest which both will work on. For each other.
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That was cheesy as fuck