Youssef x nathan oneshots | heartstopper

🥀Hanahaki🥀

Petals could be felt running through his veins as the flowers slowly took over his body. A tear left his eye as he stared at the ceiling. Youssef would never tell him that he loved him, he would rather die than let himself go through the pain.
•••
It all started four weeks prior when the two were sat in a staff meeting bored out of their minds. Youssef looked around finding anything to look at then caught his eyes. The eyes were soft and pure, Youssef couldn't help but stare into them as his heart began to race. Feeling something inside him began to bloom Youssef pulled away from his gaze blushing. It would be that small and simple interaction that would kill Youssef from the inside. After the meeting the man pulled Youssef to the side with a smile "hi youssef" he whispered to him. His heart raced faster while his cheeks burned and sudden pain grew in his stomach, "Nathan, h..h.hi" he stuttered out trying to ignore everything happening to his body. Nathan was speaking to him but Youssef didn't know what he was saying but he nodded along until suddenly he felt a large hand on his wrist lightly pulling him to the art room. Once the two got in the room they sat down on the nearest table and started talking as the flowers in Youssef's body bloomed even more.
•••
Two weeks after that interaction Youssef's body was slowly became a garden to amaryllis, gardenia and crocus. Every morning he would wake up with the pain of coughing up petals and sometimes blood. As soon as Youssef realised this was what was killing him he decided to say quiet. He couldn't let Nathan know that he was gonna die, let alone that it would be because he loved him. He lifted his head to see his little cat, Gatsby, pawing at his leg with a sad look on his face. Youssef sat on the floor resting the cat onto his lap as he rubbed his face "Gatsby I promise darling that if I leave you, you won't be alone okay?" he spoke as the cat purred in response. The part that hurt Youssef the most was the potential of losing his dearest Gatsby. After giving Gatsby attention he placed him on the floor and went to brush his teeth, knowing that he'll probably doing his all over again in the next couple of hours. He sighed picking up Gatsby and going to lay on his bed to do some reading.
•••
He couldn't believe that he had suffered for the past four weeks and all because he was in love. Youssef grabbed a notebook and pen, he began to write.
━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━
Dear Nathan,
I'm sorry that you have to read this. I wish I wasn't so stupid that I managed to fall in love with you and end my life in the process. By the time you read this I will be nothing but a garden of flowers which will soon die once again. I truly do wish I wasn't so scared and that we could be together but I can't let myself feel that kinda rejection, not again at least. Please do not hate yourself for what becomes of me as this was never was yourself and you could never had stopped this.
Yours sincerely,
Youssef.
━━━━━━♡♥♡━━━━━━
As he put the pen down next to him he looked at messy handwriting on a tear stained page. He got up and slowly walked down the stairs into the back garden were he placed the book on his little table. He laid on the grass looking at the sky. Gatsby soon followed after laying on his chest and curling in a ball. Youssef kissed him gently on the head as he whispered "I'm sorry, my baby" with a broken voice. It was then the flowers took his body from him.
•••
The next day Nathan had came over worrying that Youssef hadn't come to work the day prior. He used the spare key and open the door being greeted with nothing but silence. Looking around Nathan called out Youssef's and Gatsby's name, recieving no answer. Giving up on the inside he noticed the back door being opened. As soon as he stepped out he saw Gatsby laid in a pile of flowers but no Youssef. He took another look at the flowers. His favourite flowers. Tears presented themselves in his eyes as he turned to the table they had coffee at so many times. The notebook caught his eye so he picked it up recognising Youssef's slightly messy handwriting. As he read the letter tears spilled down his cheeks and he fell to his knees. He rested the book on the floor and turned to Gatsby. The small cat cautiously made his way to him and began to paw at him. Nathan picked him and held him close crying into his soft fur. He knew he couldn't leave the kitten alone, he wouldn't do that to Gatsby or Youssef, so he took grabs all the things he needed and took him home. Not only that but Youssef's hoodie to bring them both comfort.
•••1 year later•••
It had been a year since the incident. A year without Youssef. All of Truham and Higgs had been effected in some way but no one hurt as much as Nathan did. Everyday he had written a small letter not as diary though as if he was talking to Youssef. As he walked into his garden with a watering can in hand and Gatsby following behind, he went to the flower bed. The bed had the familiar flowers from the year prior and some new additions such as baby's breath, lavender rose, bleeding heart and calla lily. Everyday Nathan came out side and kept the flowers healthy for him. After watering the flowers he put the can down, wrapping his arms around himself with the soft hoodie he was wearing. He looked in the middle of the bed. There rested a stone that read "To my beloved Youssef".