Beat Down ➵ au h.s

Chapter 31

A rose loosing a pedal is like me loosing you.
That one pedal could make the whole rose fall apart
- Me

Christina's POV

The world around me was numb, I could hear my dad crying and yelling, it was as if I couldn't feel. But I knew it was only because I didn't want to feel anything.

He was dead.

My little brother, the one who I would get annoyed with at times, the one who came to me when he was figuring out his sexuality, was dead.

It seemed like endless hours for my dad to stop crying, and for the hospital staff to tell us that we should head home, before we left. My father didn't protest against me going with Harry, but of course mother did.

I simply shook my head telling her she didn't control me before getting into Harry's car.

Currently we were driving back to Harry's house, it was silent but I was glad. I wanted nothing more than to just go cry myself to sleep on Harry's bed.

Harry pulled up into the drive way. He made sure to jog around to my side and open the door for me, when we got inside I tried to just ignore Harry, but he wasn't having any of that. Instead he gently pulled me to his chest and guided me to the couch. He let me sob into his chest, by the time I had calmed down a spot of his shirt was damp with tears, as I was going to apologize he pecked my lips signaling that it was okay and he didn't want me to apologize. His grip tightened on me when I looked up to him.

"I'm not good with comforting people. But Chrissy he's in a better place. He would've been in so much pain with the tumor if he survived." He says he's not good at comforting but he's doing a great job at the moment, I wish he could understand that.

"I-I know, it's just, he was so innocent and carefree. He would've gone so far in l-life." Lips were pressed against my forehead, and in that moment I knew that I was getting deeper and deeper inside of the darkness that is Harry Styles.

People constantly remind me that Harry would break my heart, but I couldn't help but see him in a different light. I got to see a side of him that no one could. My eyelids began to feel heavier until sleep took over me.

•••

I woke up with arms encircled around me, my heart was aching but I couldn't cry anymore. I hung onto the thought that Cory was in a better place. Harry was right, Cory would've gone through immense pain if he was alive.

I felt content in Harry's arm but I should probably call my dad and check on him, I knew mother had probably went out so she wouldn't have to hear or see my dad grieve. My dad deserved so much better than her, she wasn't even a real mother to any of us, or a real wife, with the way she acted.

The thought stayed in my head, I would have to tell Harry about the real thing with mother.

But this wasn't a good time to bring back the memories of what happened, I wondered if my dad had talked to her and explained what happened. She did have the right to know.

I could imagine why he wouldn't though. It would cause her so much more damage to add onto what's happening in her life at the moment.

Managing to wriggle out of Harry's hold without waking him up I took my phone off of the charger and made my way to the balcony.

I took note that it was one a.m, but something told me my dad was awake.

It rang four times before my dad picked up his voice groggy and low, just by hearing it I could tell he had been non-stop crying.

"Hey dad, how are you holding up?" It was a stupid question but I honestly don't know what to say, I couldn't reassure him everything was going to be okay because I myself didn't know if it would be.

"I'm starting to believe he's in a better place." He whispered into the phone, it broke my heart because I cared about my dad even if he's made some negative choices in the past.

"I never really got to do much with him, I-"

"Dad, it's alright. I know for a fact Cory doesn't resent you for anything. He has too much of a big heart to do that." I didn't want to say 'had' because he still does.

"You should get some sleep dad, please don't let this affect you and your health." I've already lost so many people close to me, it's like a repeating pattern. 

"I will. Make sure that boy doesn't hurt you Christina." I heard the balcony doors open signaling Harry was awake. Arms slipped around my waist, Harry's body pressed against me, I could feel his warmth radiating onto me as I relaxed into his hold.

"He won't dad, love you."

"Love you too, goodnight." Despite saying he would go to sleep I knew my dad wouldn't make an effort to. I was only hope he wasn't trying to drink away his pain, he wasn't too fond of alcohol and he's never been affected or abused by it in the past but there could always be a snapping point where he just needed to drown the pain.

"Come back to bed." Harry murmured into my neck after a few minutes passed, I nodded whilst he pecked the top of my head. I was grateful to have Harry in my life despite what others told me. He was perfect, but flawed in so many ways at the same time.

But aren't we all?

When we went inside Harry pulled me back to his chest but with me turning in his arms and pressing my head onto his chest.

I could hear his heartbeat, which was lulling me to sleep, but just before I slipped into sleep I heard Harry whisper to me.

"It beats for you."