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This chapter contains hard and emotional content. Please, do not read it if you don’t feel like it or if you are bullied or something ok?
CHAPTER 27
9TH SEPTEMBER 2012
This is getting out of my hands. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m starting to hate him and I couldn’t say anything at all. It will ruin my career. I couldn’t tell anybody, neither Theresa. I was scared. I am scared. I don’t know what will happen. It’s been 4 days since he told me that, but in all those days he has been treating me really bad. I had nobody. This entire struggle is killing me inside me, but I had to put my biggest smile on my face because I didn’t want anyone to noticed it. Now, I have to cover some parts of my body because I have bruises.
I used to have a friend, and I miss him a lot. You have no idea; I could tell him anything I wanted. But he doesn’t speak to me anymore. I don’t know why, that’s the worst point.
Finally we have finished our tour, we’re now back home but that’s not the point.
This morning we got up early because we had to fly back to London. I sat with Theresa in the plane and held her arm because I didn’t want her to leave. I didn’t want to be near David. Once we got there, we were straight to our house. David insisted in coming with us, I told him he didn’t have to, but you know what happened next, right? I couldn’t say no. On the way back on the car Louis phoned Theresa and told him that they were going to have a barbecue the next day. I smiled because I wanted to see them, I missed them and I needed to scape from this bubble I got in. But of course David had to talk. Theresa went outside the house because she was talking with Harry too.
“You’re not going” David said
“What? You can’t say that to me David. I’m going, you’re not my mother or my father to tell me what I can or can’t do”
“Yeah, you’re right” he said pushing me against the wall again “But I’m your boyfriend and of course I can tell you what you can or cannot do”
“This is insane, David. You’re not anymore with me! We’re done, remember? Get over it for once in your life! I’m sick and tired of you and of course I’m going, they’re my friends”
“We are together until I say we’re done. Plus, those stupid boys are your friends? Please! They seem like five 3 year-old kids”
“David, stop, you’re hurting me” I said. I tried to punch him but he was stronger than me. I started to cry quietly and then I heard Theresa closing the door. He let me escape and I went directly to the bathroom because I didn’t want her to notice that I was crying. I could hear David left saying Theresa that he really loved me and everything as well.
“[Y/N]!” said Theresa
“I’m in the bathroom” I said opening the shower “I’m gonna have a shower, ok?”
“Ok, so I’ll talk to you later about tomorrow”
I looked myself at the mirror. I couldn’t look at me. I looked horrible! I took my top off and I looked myself again. I have a bruise on the bone of one of my hip, two bruises on my left arm and another purple almost dark on my right hand. I am thinner now due to the stress and because I don’t eat as much as I used to eat. I have lost my appetite. To be honest I wanted to scape. I got in the shower and relaxed. I started to cry even more intense. I needed to leave out all the feelings I had inside. I wanted to tell Theresa. I didn’t care if I lost roles or anything. I just wanted to be safe.
I went out of the shower and dried my hair. Put my sweat pants and hoodie on and went out of the bathroom.
“Wow, what a long shower”
“Yeah, I needed to. And I need to talk to you. Have a sit please”
“What’s wrong, babe? You’re scaring me”
I lifted up my hoodie and pulled up the sleeves of it, showing my bruises.
“What’s that, [Y/N]? I mean, I-I know what they are but…”
“It’s David” I said whispering
“What? David? What do you mean?”
“David did this to me” I said hoarsely. I started crying
“Oh God, since when?”
“I don’t know, 5 days ago?”
“Come here babe” she said hugging me “But why didn’t you tell me before?”
“’Cause I was scared”
“Scared for what?”
“I don’t know, I might loose my career and I don’t want to. I had to give up to so many things to be where I am right now. Please don’t say anything to anyone”
“But, [Y/N] you have to tell the police. That dumbass must be punished or something”
“I know” I was sobbing so hard. I was so nervous now, my hands were shaking and I couldn’t stop crying
“Babe, please, stop, I’m here. Oh my god, you’re shaking! I’m going to prepare you a cup of tea, is that all right?”
I nodded with my head. Soon I took small sips from it.
“Please, promise me you won’t tell anybody”
“I promise you”
“Thank you”
“Ok, so tomorrow are you coming with us? But if you’re not going I’m not going. I don’t want to leave you here alone”
“I don’t know… David told me-“
“What did he told you”
“That I can’t go. He’s very jealous, Theresa. See what he does to me”
“So what? You can’t say yes to everything he wants to, you’re nothing related to him, you’re not his girlfriend anymore. It’s worst if you do what he tells you. I’m here and I’m going to protect you.”
“I want to go but…”
“But you’re going. Come on, smile please!”
“I can’t” I said wiping out my tears
“Yes you can, come on!” I smiled at her and she kissed me on my forehead “See? You’re even prettier when you smile”
“Thanks, so what are we gonna do?”
“Well, it’s a hot tub-pool party”
“Oh, good. I’m not going then. I can’t show off all the bruises”
“Well, you can go, but you can pretend you have a cold or something and you don’t want to get worse”
“Well, yeah, that makes sense”
She explained me every single detail about the party and we spend the entire afternoon and night doing a film marathon.
I hope things get better soon, dear Diary
Good night! xx
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