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ONE MESSAGE RECEIVED! unknown OPEN | HIDE
unknown: you should take care of yourself
reading the words over and over, i only know one person who knows this phone's number, considering that he was the one who gave me this smartphone.
how could you jeon jeongguk? who are you to tell me to "take care of myself" if in the first place you're the one who keeps on making me feel like this?
shaking me up, making me so vulnerable to the point that i'm going insane?
i've had enough of you and your lies jeon fuckingkook. i've had enough of you and your games. why, just of all people you would choose to play with, why my heart? why me? there are a lot of people who would die just to spend time with you and yet why, why the choi haine who only wanted to keep out of the limelight – why must you choose to play with me?
you made me believe that fairy tales do exist – that even despite how i look and other's criticism towards me, you proved that i am your princess and you were my one and only prince. where did all the glitter that used to shine in your eyes when you look at me, go?
where everything about us just a make belief fantasy like stories? did you had fun playing with me and see the different shades of choi haine and her pitiful self as you had me all wrapped up in the tips of your fingers just like a puppet?
i was a fool and i finally realized that but, i can't spend my whole lifetime moping and wishing that you would come back to me.
i would do anything just to move on from this misery.
CALLING taetae 👽💀
connecting
ringing
"h—hello?" taehyung's voice rang and i could hear the huskiness in his tone, indicating that he had just woken up. i could feel my heart getting light and an invisible lump forming on my throat.
"tae?" i mumbled, nervous as wreck but managed to squeak his name. i heard a couple of shuffling and a stopped yawn escape on his lips before his deep voice resonated against my ear once more.
"h—haine? wait, it's already late at night . . . why are you calling me at one o'clock in the morning and –"
"yes" i cut him, i was eager to give him the answer i had been dying to say the moment i heard his voice.
"h—huh?" he asked a little confused and i was feeling on edge.
i need to move on and i just want to escape from this unbearable pain. "i, i want to try moving on with you" i mumbled finally, voice as soft as a hymn and almost mistaken as a whisper.
". . ." the moment those words escaped against my lips, i hadn't heard anything from tae almost as if he had dropped the call.
". . ." a minute has passed and then i checked my phone, it was still connected.
"tae?" i mumbled, feeling anxious all of a sudden. what if he didn't want me anymore, too? what if he had found someone too? am i fooling myself again –
"i—is this a dream?" my train of thoughts were snapped into reality when i heard his voice against my ear as it was soon followed by a sob and sniffle.
"taehyung" i felt a pang of guilt crawl its way on my heart, hesitation dawned on me and the thought if this was really a good decision, haunted me.
"tell me, this isn't a dream right?" another breathy sigh and sob escaped on his mouth. is this really the right thing? am i doing the right thing?
why do i feel like this will only make things worse? what if i don't and won't be able to move on with him? i'm –
"dear ladybugs, please tell me this isn't just a dream" i caught his voice as it trembled midway, my heart cracked.
". . ." my voice was caught up inside my throat as an invisible lump started to form in the pits of my stomach and my ears was soon filled with his weeps, i couldn't find the strength to speak. my heart was suddenly feeling tight and i couldn't properly breathe.
why am i feeling bad? why do i suddenly felt this way, my heart hurts even more.
"i love you so much, haine" at the mention of those words, my heart thrashed as my eyes automatically glossed.
this is so wrong – i'm going to use someone for my own selfish reasons. this is wrong. i'm going to use someone and what if nothing comes out of it?
"you don't know how much you make me so happy" eyes pooling with tears, i covered my mouth with my hand – trying so hard to not even let a single cry escape. i feel worse.
"i promise to make you the happiest girl on earth" sincere and tender, i heard his voice lull me.
why did i do this? clouded with grief and sadness, i let the emotions overpower my rationality. i will use the warm, caring and kind hearted taehyung for my own selfish reasons. i am no different to jeongguk now, playing with others feelings with no remorse and second thought. i should've thought thoroughly,
