Yoonmin Oneshots

The Blue from Baskins and the Pink from Robins

[Not my story]
Ao3 sehunswife

Min Yoongi despises the existence of his friends to an extent that may be verbally indescribable. Well, no backing out now, once he had been dragged into a club and drunk out of his wits. What was he thinking exactly when he agreed to this?

He must have been drugged, yes. That is exactly what must have happened.

"Bros and hoes! Since we all are carefully drunk, let's play truth or dare!" Hoseok, Yoongi's best friend shouts, trying to voice himself over the loud club music.

"What the fuck is carefully drunk?" Namjoon manages to say, the alcohol slurring his words slightly, his head on the bar counter. Of course he was ignored, since his voice was merely louder than a whisper.

Namjoon and Hoseok decided to bring Yoongi to a club since it had been months since he 'loosened up' and got 'laid'. Yoongi hates his friends because it was true.

Since they all were in a club, they didn't exactly have space to spin the bottle, it was an overcrowded venue. So instead they just chose to play 21 dares.

And so they play, a game leading to obvious regrets the next morning but also a fit of unstoppable giggles when they see their friends do the most idiotic things ever.

The first dare was given to Hoseok, proposed by the great Min indeed, to pole dance. Hoseok seemed to be so enthusiastic about it - as he sprinted to his stage and moved his hips gracefully from side to side, holding the pole, slow dancing into very exaggerated moves as the beat of the music increased. By then, almost all the people had eyes only on Hoseok, most with amused eyes. Even the bartenders were just staring at him in confused awe.

But all hell broke lose when Hoseok decided to open his mouth and sing along to the evergreen song Expensive Girl - its 2037 and the song is still the biggest hit. No, its not 2037, it's 2018. But Expensive Girl will always be the jam.

"TAKE IT OFF NOW GIRL~" Hoseok yelled, jumping down from the platform where the pole stood, slut dropping immediately. He began running around in circles, wiggling his butt, taking a random bottle and slashing the champagne around after opening it. Hoseok's audience were in a wild mess, screaming along with Hoseok. Namjoon and Yoongi were totally losing their shit, holding their stomachs while literally wheezing out their laughter.

"Carefully drunk, my ass." Namjoon snorts.

They cheered on their best friend, hooting and shouting what a great performer he was.

Namjoon and Yoongi realized when shit had gone too far when they saw Hoseok pull off his shirt, to thankfully reveal another shirt (what the fuck), but about to strip that one off too, so they sprinted up to him before his title changed from pole dancer to spontaneous performer to a fucking stripper. Hoseok was too caught up in his high to notice that Namjoon was pulling him away, Yoongi quickly apologizing to the crowd (mainly cause he was too tiny to lift an exhausted Hoseok). The crowd just booed and booed and booed but Yoongi was really not in the mind to care, his high pitched laughter had stuck on loop.

They pulled Hoseok to the bathroom, patting his back softly as he puked everything out. "Thank god you didn't vomit on stage bro." Namjoon says.

"Bro." Hoseok squeaks.

"That was hilarious bro." Namjoon continues.

"Thanks bro."

"Anytime bro."

"If you guys don't stop this bro bullshit I'm going to walk outta here." Yoongi interrupts.

"I'm going to remember that dare forever." Hoseok manages to say before he pukes again.