Stigma 2 | Mark Lee & Huang Xuxi

Chapter 35: Self

Please read author's note at the end!
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Tuesday - 9:12 am

Lucas texted earlier and told me he couldn't come. And I'm honestly fine with it.

"It's so pretty up here!" Betty gushed as we walked out to the rooftop garden. It was Betty's first time seeing it.

"It is," I said as we both walked towards a table.

Betty was panning her phone to record the view for her Snapchat and Instagram stories as I sat down.

I brought my phone out and saw text messages in the nuna is jjang group chat.

Sent at 8:25 am

rosyrenjun: GOOD MORNING NUNA

nana💖: good morning nuna! we're sorry we haven't been able to message you lately

mybabyboy: GOOD MORNING !!!

cutiechenle: we've been really busy, but we haven't forgotten about you

jollyjeno: we miss you!

heartyhaechan: i miss you the most!

nana💖: no!!! i do!

mybabyboy: kids 😒

rosyrenjun: says the actual kid

nana💖: i hope you have an amazing day nuna! let's plan a hangout soon!

jollyjeno: and we'll invite our girlfriends too, they miss you 🥺

I smile at the messaged and then replied.

Present - 9:17 am

Me: aww you guys are always so sweet! i miss you all so so so much! good morning to you too 🥰

"Am I still going to look for flights?" I look up and see that Betty has settled down after taking selcas.

I think about her question for a while.

Do I want to leave? What I want is ... I just want peace. I want to wake up in the morning and not feel anxious. I want to feel contented and loved with being alive.

I want space away from the negativity. But I didn't want to leave and go home to Chicago.

"Jen?" Betty asked and I smiled at her.

I know what I want, "Jeju Island," I said and she stared at me, "let's spend the rest of our stay in Jeju Island," I said and she smiled.

"Thank god," she relaxed in her chair and I laughed, "so when will we head out?" She sat up straight as she went to look at her phone, probably to check when we could go to Jeju Island.

I look at her for a moment and a thought came up, "Wait, B. What about you and Winwin?" I asked and she laughed.

"Aw! You thought about me!" She joked and I rolled my eyes, "Don't worry about that. We're just friends," she shrugged as she continued to scroll through her phone, "besides we planned this whole summer to spend time together! And honestly, we haven't really done that," Betty said and I could hear the trace of sadness in her voice.

"I'm sorry about that," I said and she shook her head.

"Hey! Don't start a pity party. It's a fact we haven't really done much together, but it doesn't mean I regret it. I understand why things happened, okay? So don't you dare start thinking that this your fault, it's not. You needed to face issues and problems. And I'm proud of you," she always knew what to say to keep my mind in check. "So Jeju Island for the rest of our time here? You're totally sure? What about Johnny?" She asked putting her phone down on the table.