italics are flashbacks:) but they might also be thoughts
i walked down the stairs, the smell of fresh avocados and toast immediately hitting me. i turn the corner and step quietly into the kitchen, watching as ethan cooked breakfast.
i almost smiled, thinking back to all the times i was so ecstatic to see him in the mornings, but it's not like that anymore.
he's changed. we've changed.
"ethan!" i yell, running over to him and hugging his torso from behind. he chuckles lightly, turning his focus from the breakfast in front of him to me.
"good morning princess. how'd you sleep?" he kissed my forehead, my nose scrunching up at the action.
"pretty good. you?" he sighed, turning back around to finish making the food.
"good. i hope avocado toast is okay, i made it for breakfast." he passes me a plate as i hop up on the island.
"it's perfect," i mumble, pulling him in for a chaste kiss.
"i said good morning." ethan's voice brought me back to earth, making my tiny smile disappear.
"morning." he put a plate of toast on the kitchen island, also handing me the avocado spread.
"here." he mumbled, walking past me to the dining table.
"thanks." i whisper as i sat down across from him.
we sat in uncomfortable silence while we ate. silence always made my mind go wild, thinking about anything and everything. however, apparently today's subject was ethan and me.
why haven't we broken up? not that i want to, but if we don't even truly communicate as a couple should, what's the purpose? what am i waiting for?
"what's up with you?" he questioned, pulling me back into reality. i looked up at him, his focus on me. for the first time in what feels like forever, he actually seemed interested in what i had to say.
"just thinking." i was actually having a real conversation with him, although it's been two sentences, it's better than what we've done recently.
the more i thought, the more frustrated i became. i couldn't hold back my emotions anymore...apparently.
"y'know what? i can't do this anymore!" i startled both ethan and myself with my words and tone.
"do what?" he snapped back, his voice loud.
"this!" i motioned to both of us, my voice loud as well. "we don't even talk anymore, not as a couple does at least! i just- i feel so distant from you all. the. time! and you don't seem to care at all, do you? do you even care that it literally kills me to not sleep in the same bed as you? that i cry myself to sleep about every night because i can't hold you anymore?" i exhaled heavily, plopping back down in my chair. i wiped the tears off of my face, i hadn't even realized they were there.
i played with my fingers, not daring to make eye contact with the boy across the table.
the only thing that came after my breakdown was silence. i flinched as a large yet soft hand rested on my leg. i looked up, making eye contact with ethan, his eyes watery and puffy.
"you have no idea how much this distance between us hurts me. y/n i love you, so much. so much, in fact, that it hurts me to watch us fall apart right in front of me. trust me, i miss you just as much, if not more than you miss me. baby please. let's build a bridge between us. let's break the distance. i'm begging you."
more tears fell from my eyes as he finished his final sentence. without hesitation, i practically threw myself onto him, wrapping my arms around his neck.
"i love you," i whispered, my sobs making the short sentence sound broken. "i love you so much ethan."
his arms wrapped around me, holding me closer and tighter than ever before. one of his hands cradled the back of my head, holding it close as well.
"my sweet girl." he pulled away, his arms still holding me close. he pushed a strand of hair behind my ear and wiped tears off of my cheeks.
"i've missed you, my love." i looked up at him, softly chuckling. we stared at each other for a moment in silence. i slowly leaned into him, connecting our lips for a long awaited kiss.
the rest of the day we spent either on the couch or in his bed, together, watching movies and/or cuddling.
published aug 19 2020
the next update is my last part in this book, so make sure you watch for new updated from my 'grayson dolan imagines' book soon after next part:)<3
