Alsina imagines (On Hold)

Random 3

An Ismael Cruz Cordova Imagine

"Dude I am talking to you." I said walking after him as he went into the kitchen.

"WHAT SAVANNA?" He looked at me from the sink where he was standing. "You do whatever you want right? Never listen to what I say to you so what the hell do you want us to talk about?" I just stood there and said nothing cause I felt that he was being unfair towards me. I mean Ive made mistakes in the past but I've learned from them. Who doesn't make them anyway. Gosh my big brother can be such an ass when he really wants to be.

After our parents passed years ago, with him being 19 and me being 13 he became my legal guardian. Moved us from Puerto Rico to New York where he worked hard to start his career as a professional tattoo artist. At 30 he has done pretty great for himself. I mean He owns a few shops around NYC and two back home which are currently run by our cousin JoshuaYea he has done good.

Then theres me, the plus one in his life. That one thing he cant shake off. A 24-year-old girl fresh out of college due to changing her majors 5 times or at least that how it feels, still trying to figure out what to do with her life despite the degree that she has.

Crazy right? Yeah I know. The academic achievement I have is not what I want to do that is why I am stuck as his receptionist at one of his shops whilst Im working towards what I want.

Currently our quarrel was because he didn't want to let me go out with my friends. Says that he is not comfortable with me being in places where there will be alcohol and possibly drugs considering what happened two years ago. I had gone out on my 22nd birthday and did some things which involved drug use. Unlike some I was lucky enough to get it out of my system sooner rather than later.

Now I cant seem to get over that because I'm constantly reminded of that day and the many months that followed. I know I should've been responsible but it happened and I've recovered, can't I just move on with my life?

"Im waiting." He said seeing that I wasn't saying anything. After moments of silence he shook his big head and walked away from me.

"You are being unfair now Ismael." I said in a low voice causing him to stop walking and turned to look at me. "I know what I did was stupid and reckless and believe me I really regret all that I have put you through. But you can't be dwelling on that one incident for the rest of our lives." I said to him shaking my head.

"That one incident you're down playing almost cost you your life."He said walking back to me looking at me in the eyes. "Do you think I enjoyed finding you unconscious in your bathroom? Had I not came home the time I did you would not be standing in front of me asking to go out with the same people who introduced you to that shit so NO Savanna I am not taking that risk again I'm sorry. Hate me If you want but you are not going and that is final." He added then walked away yet again.

I could hear the anger in his voice, I could see the fear in his greenish eyes as he uttered each word. The guilt of not being there that night when I overdosed. The pain of almost losing the only sibling that he has was clearly evident in them.

I followed him into the kitchen and found him by the counter with his elbows on it and his face in his hands. "Ismael?" I called out to him but he didn't face me. I came closer to him and pulled him by his shoulder and hugged him as he silently cried. "I'm sorry. I didnt mean to hurt or scare you like that. I promise you it will never happen again. But for me to prove that to you, you have to trust me. Trust that I have learned from my mistakes. Okay? I need you to believe in me. Please." I said still holding him in my arms. I felt him shaking his head and I uttered a please but never got a reply.

He finally lifted his head still shaking his head. Out of nowhere I dont know what took over me I grabbed his face I kissed him on his soft lips. I honestly do not know what came over me to do that because I thought the lust like feelings I had for him had gone a long time ago. Maybe its the way he looked at me or the how he licked his lips that brought all that back or his body that I've seen when he is lounging around the house with no top on. I really dont know.