Alsina imagines (On Hold)

My Baby 3... One step at a time.

You left the hospital the next morning like August promised u would. "Ok bye Nurse Taylor and that you very much" you say to your nurse whose been taking care of you. August signs your release forms and yall head to the car. "You good bae?" He asks and u just close your eyes and give him a small smile.

Ya'll drive for 20 minutes back to your home. As soon as you get home you get out the car and walk in the house. You walk in the kitchen with Aug behind you. "Mama, imma go run you a hot bath okay?" He says, u just nodded and he disappeared upstairs. And drank ur juice thinking about the lil one you just lost. You couldn't believe it. Silently you've been praying to God to please wake u up from this long dream. It just didn't feel real.

You didn't even notice that you was crying till you felt cold air on your cheeks "oh God" you whisper and whip them away. "Hey baby, mama wants us to come over on Sunday for lunch" he says coming in the kitchen. "I don't think I will be able to go Aug. What if I break down in front of everyone? Remember we aint even tell em I.... was pregnant" as u say the last part a tear fell. August hugged you tight and said "don't worry bae you'll be fine ok? I'll be with you" "Okay then" you respond.

*Sunday morning*

You got up feeling crappy and depressed. You thought you was getting better but clearly not. You get outta bed and take a shower, brush your teeth and got dressed in a black and gold maxi strapless dress with black and gold gladiator scandals. Eyeliner, mascara and clear lip gloss was all the make up you needed. No jewelry nothing, you just didn't wanna go anywhere basicall.

You go downstairs and August was eating cereal on his phone " Good morning" you say to him as you walk to the fridge for some juice "morning bae, you dressed already wow" he chuckles and you put on a fake smile. He continued to eat then went to shower then came down wearing Black True Religion jeans, read V neck t shirt and black red Nike sneakers. He only had on 1 necklace that's the one with Mel's pic. "You ready to go baby" he said walkin down to the living room where you was laying on the couch."Yeah." You didn't feel like talking.

Yall took an hour drive to his mama and got there. Yall was the last to get there lol. You got out the car already feeling like you wanna cry. You push that feelin aside and walk in. Everyone was happy to see yall and you hugged everybody and went to the bathroom. U stayed there for a good 15 minutes just crying. Eventually u came down and re did your make up and got out. August came to you "u was crying again love?" He asks "please August" you push him a bit ans pass him.

Lunch was served and yall sat at the table as mama said grace. You couldn't help but think about the baby and you felt like crying again. Mama finished and everone dug in their food. August leaned in to your ear "baby please eat" "I'm not hungry Aug, I don't feel like anything" you tell him with watery eyes. U blinked to keep em back. To not make them suspicious you dish up a small amount of Green salad and ate that. "YN, you not hungry baby" mama A asks. "Not really ma'am, I had breakfast this morning" you lied caz all u had was juice.

They start conversing and you were left to your thoughs and you felt that u was gonna burst in tears.

August was talking to his brother and you just wanted to get up and go to the car, u wanted to be alone. You text him. "Can I go sit in the car coz I feel like I'm gonna burst into tears babe please." You send it and he took his phone out of his pocket, seeing its a text from you he looks up to u and back to his phone. His face put on a sad expression. He handed u the car keys and held your hand. Then he dialed your number and called you.

"I'm sorry I gotta take this call" u excused yourself from the table and walked outside. You got in the car and as if on cue u burst into tears. Just wishing that your baby was still in you, you felt so alone and empty. You couldn't shake that feeling off. Suddenly there was a knock on the window u opened your eyes and saw mama A standing there. U instantly knew he told them.

You open the door and she stretches her hands out to u, u jump out the car and just let it out on her shoulder. She just held u and said nothing "mama I feel so empty, alone." She still didn't say nothing but rub your back "I'm going crazy mama, I need saving or I'm gonna loose it. I don't wanna question God but why me mama? Why me?" You cry loudly. She held you tight and said "if not you then who baby?" He pulls you away "Who?" She asks again, u remained quiet. "Allow him to break you child and trust him that he'll mend u again."

With that she hugged you and left you in the car. A few minutes later The front door opened and out came August whipping his eyes. You got out of the car and walked to him and hugged him tight and yall cried on each others shoulders. "I'm sorry baby" u say "I'm sorry for pushing you away, I didn't mean too Aug. I'm sorry" you cry hard on him "its okay baby. Hmm?" He pulled away and kissed you passionately "its okay my love, we'll get through this together and I'll give you another one, okay? I'll give you another baby or babies" he said with a smile and u laughed and kissed him again."We'll take it one step at a time bae ok?" He said, you nod and say " I love you Anthony and I will never stop loving you" a tear fell out and he kissed it "I love you even more YN and I don't want u to stop coz I won't too." He said, then hugged you and yall went in the car and went home.

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