In My Life (John Lennon fanfic)

Chapter 70.

Beeping. Sirens. Ringing. Choking. Screams. Whispers. Names. Voices. Breathing.

All at once I began to feel my chest tighten as I gasped for air. I couldn't see. It felt like I was trapped. My lungs struggling to breath. I realised I was underwater. Reaching for someone but feeling nothing. I screamed but no sound.

I saw a house. A road. The cloudy sky. I could smell air. Cool, fresh air. I turned and saw someone down the road. Waiting for me. His hand extended. My name being called out....that voice.

I squinted my eyes and realised where I was. No...I wasn't ready. I can't be here. My lungs filled with air. The sound of my heartbeat fading. My name getting louder. The smell of blood filling my nostrils.

..

My eyes shot open as I gasped for air. The nurse came rushing over and removed the oxygen mask from my face. I coughed and breathed heavily.

"She's awake! She's concious!" She yelled. The doctor walked over and listened to my heart beat. I didn't even have enough energy to speak. The doctor gave me some pain killers, a sleeping pill and told me I needed to rest.

..

Seven hours later

"...why is mommy asleep?" I heard a familiar voice.

"Shhh. She's just tired love."

"Hmmmnnnhh" I mumbled. Opening my eyes, my vision was clear. John was sitting in a chair beside me as Max layed on the bed. I rubbed my eyes and reached out to John. He held my hand.

"The doctor said you wen't through some trauma. Ye lost a lot of blood and almost didn't make it. I didn't know what to think I...I thought this was it." His voice broke as he went on. "I was sure you were gone. I couldn't stand the thought of you never seeing our baby.."

"Shhh." I squeezed his hand with as much strength as I could. Which wasn't much. "I'm here."

"You're here." He whispered. I gave him a small smile.

"So um...who's the little one?"

He laughed and scooted closer. I sat up a little and extended my arms out. Our little boy sleeping soundly in my embrace. I giggled and stroked his cheek with my finger.

"He's so precious. Does he have a name already?" I asked.

"William." He whispered. I smiled and cradled him in my arms.

"Our precious William." I said to myself.

..

When I was discharged from the hospital, John managed to finish the crib, let me rest and take Max to school everyday. I appreciated his effort. But after a week of burnt food, listening to him gag over changing diapers, and almost crashing the car, I was ready to resume my duties as the woman of the household.

December 1, 1980

I woke up to snoring at four in the morning. John must have been exhausted to not be able to hear the baby crying. The dark skies outside reminded me of the days in Liverpool.

"Shhh baby. What's wrong huh?" I asked. He cried and cried as I checked his diaper. I changed him. Still crying. I cradled him and kissed the top of his head.

I unbuttoned my top and soon, he was quiet. I watched as he held onto me, sucking and enjoying his morning meal. It wasn't until he finished, I noticed John watching. I blushed.

"I thought you were sleeping."

"I was. But then I woke up to silence. It was a bit odd." He chuckled. I giggled and leaned over, kissing his cheek. "I love watching you and him together. Just so natural."

"You should get some rest baby. You've been such a sweetheart to me and the boys. I think you deserve some rest." I stroked the side of his face. He smiled and kissed my thumb.

"Only if ye lay in me arms."

I smiled and nodded. "Just let me put William to bed."

"Let me see him." He leaned over and watched Will fall back to sleep. I kissed John's cheek.

"I think we make a good looking family yeah?" I teased. John laughed and looked at me.

"We do. I love you."

"I love you too." I whispered.

I set William back into his crib and snuggled in bed with John. We kissed and wrapped each other in our arms. I rested my head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat until I fell back into a deep sleep.

..........