A year as a Narnian || 365 Narnia one shots (Part one)

110: So be it

April 20th - Prompt: Brother

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Edmund swallowed hard as he stared at himself in the bathroom mirror, leant against the sink with the door closed.

He'd only been living at Cair for a week, which meant the whole thing with Jadis wasn't even three weeks ago.

He scowled slightly as the thought crossed his mind, self hate filling him at the reminder that he had betrayed his own family.

He had agreed without hesitation to hand them over to the Witch, to trade them for something as stupid as Turkish Delight, when he knew - deep down - that she was evil.

He had known, even if he'd tried denying it, there was always that voice is the back of his mind telling him that Jadis wasn't a very nice person, but he had ignored it, and now wished he never had.

Edmund continued staring at himself, at the crown on his head, and couldn't help the confusion he felt.

Who on earth would crown him a King?

He was a traitor, he had betrayed his own family, his own kindgom, his saviour, everyone who lived in Narnia, and he could never forgive himself for it.

As he stood there, staring into the mirror and straight into his own dark brown eyes, he felt anger rising within him.

He tried to force it away, but in the end gave up, scowling at himself as one word kept crossing his mind

Traitor...

With a shout of anger and self hate, Edmund punched the mirror in front of him, so hard that it shattered with the single blow.

Tears ran from Edmunds eyes as he suddenly collapsed to the floor, ignoring the fact that he was sitting on sharp fragments of the mirror, and stared down at his knuckle, oblivious to the pain as blood ran in rivers down his hand.

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Peter's head snapped up in alarm when a cry from the bathroom reached his ears, followed by what sounded like glass smashing.

He dropped his pencil, shot up from his desk and hurried over to the door, pushing it open with probably a little more force than he intended to, but he didn't care after spotting his brother.

Edmund was sat on his knees on the floor, silently sobbing and staring down at his hand. The mirror above the sink was no longer a mirror, and bits of it lay either in the sink, on the side or across the floor, joining the blood.

"Ed..." Peter murmured in horror, rushing over and grabbing his brother's wrist.

Edmund tried to pull away, shaking his head, but Peter stopped him with just a noise, before grabbing a handkerchief from his pocket and wrapping it around Edmunds knuckles, pressing down hard to try and slow down the bleeding.

"What the heck have you done?!" Peter almost growled, anger mixed with terror filling his voice. 

Edmund shook his head again. "D - Don't." He gasped, tears streaming down his cheeks. "I - I hate myself-"

Peter grabbed Edmund's forearm with his free hand. "Don't you dare." He snapped.

"It's true!" Edmund cried. "I'm a traitor, why would I love myself!"

Peter stared at him. He should've seen this coming, Edmund had been acting quiet and reserved all that day, but he'd just put it down to his little brother being tired, boy was he wrong though.

"You are not a traitor." Peter muttered, tightening the handkerchief when there was no signs of the blood slowing.

"Yes I am-"

"Not anymore." Peter cut him off. "You're a King, an amazing, trustworthy, honest person. You're my brother Edmund, so stop this nonsense."

Edmunds sobs got harder, and he tried pulling away from Peter, but his older brother only pulled him closer and into his arms, wrapping his arm around his shoulders and holding him tightly. "You're my brother." He whispered in his ear. "And I love you, that I can promise."

Eventually Edmund had no more strength to fight, so he just relaxed into Peter's arms, utterly exhausted as his tears slowed.

Peter just held him, deciding not to say anything, not yet anyway.

But in that moment he vowed to himself that he would, eventually, get Edmund to stop blaming himself and to love every single thing about himself.

If it took him days, then brilliant.

If it took him weeks, then fine.

If it took him years, then so be it.

Peter would do absolutely anything for his brother, and loving and comforting him came naturally. So he wouldn't stop, not until Edmund understood.

But as Edmund went limp in his arms, falling asleep from the exhaustion of crying for so long, Peter allowed two tears to roll down his cheeks, for despite his promise, seeing Edmund like this was on of the few things that could actually break him.

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