Make It Simple (O2l fanfic)

chapter 51

I stood in the crowd of people looking for my best friend's face. I was in desperate need of him. I don't know how I made it through these past three days.

I was so happy before my mom died that when I started feeling trapped, I broke, shattered all at once.

I turned my head to the left to search for him before hearing a loud, "Boo", in my right ear. I screamed earning a few looks before playfully punching Troye in the shoulder. "You scared me!" He was clutching his side in laughter as I started walking towards the doors.

"Wait up!" I turned around to see him running with his rolling suit case. We walked out to the car and set loaded Troye's luggage in the car before heading home.

"I'm starving. Let's stop for food." "I mean, I won't not eat food..", I laughed at myself, "Where do you want to eat?" Troye didn't even hesitate when he answered IN and OUT.

I've never been there even thought I live in LA. "You know Troye..I've never eaten here." He stared at me, speechless for a few moments. "Let me out of this car. I don't like crazy bitches like you." I giggled before hitting the lock button for his door. "No!"

He turned at me, laughing at himself as I rolled my eyes.

We finally arrived and Troye literally jumped out of the car and was inside before I even closed my car door. I ran to catch up with him as we waited in line. After a few minutes, it was our turn to order and I got a simple burger with fries while Troye got everything you could think of one his.

We waited for our food to be prepared before sitting down and eating. "Why are you so quiet?" Some reason, Troye's known me for a short period of time yet he can tell when soething's wrong.

I took a big breath before asking the expected question, "You won't look at me differently if I tell you what's been going through my mind, will you?" He gave a look as if my answer to the question was printed in bold on his forehead.

"Of course not. Lucy, tell me what's going on." I knew once I told him, I'd feel better, so I needed to just say it. "I'm second guessing things. Now that I..raise my sister, I feel so trapped and unhappy. I don't know if I can do it anymore but I can't just abandon her. I'm basically her mom and only you know about this because I feel like such a monster."

 Troye took a bite of his burger before pointing it at me, "The first question you have to ask yourself is what's more important, you being there for her or your happiness." I took a moment and realized this was the first problem, I'm torn.

"I'm torn, I don't know honestly." He shook his head before saying, "Okay, let's say you decide to stop raising her, would you be able to live with the fact that you gave up on your sister?" This is the first time the thougt of the guilt ever crossed my mind. I could never forgive myself.

"Of course not." He nodded his head again, "So now that you made your choice, you need to figure out what you need to do to be happy and raise your sister." He was right, about all of it, but that was the problem. I can't be happy raising her.

"Everything you've said is right and helpful but that's the problem Troye, I don't want to be a mother or raise somebody. I've had to grow up so fast and moving to LA was supposed to be the opportunity to live my life."

He was quiet for a few moments, "I understand you don't want to and honestly, I wouldn't want to either. But you don't always get your way." As I said, he is right about what he's saying, but I still don't know what to do. Why me?

"Why me though? Why do I lose my mom and end up raising my sister at eight teen? Why did God chose me to have to make this decision?" Tears welled up in my eyes and Troye grabbed my hand in his and rubbed the back of it.