Dice [h.s.]

18

"She wears strength and darkness equally well, the girl has always been half goddess, half hell." -Nikita Gill

-

"Baby, come here." My dad called me over from the garden. He sounded eager, but not angry.

My dad never let me in the garden, but today he did. I would mess up all the plants with my big yellow rain boots. He would always complain to mom, but mom would yell at him for getting angry at me.

"Coming daddy!" I called out, releasing the tomato plant from between my tiny, eight year old fingers.

I ran down the long stone walkway which was lined with bright flowers and big vegetable and fruit plants. Mom said that it's healthier to grow your own, which was hard in Brooklyn. I still don't understand how we have a house. It's so crowded here.

"Pumpkin?!" My dad called out since it was taking me longer than usual to leave the garden.

"Daddy!" I called out with a smile as I turned a sharp corner and met eyes with my father.

My dad was bent down, playing with a silver latch attached to a big black box. His hair was curly brown like usual and his eyes were a pretty ocean blue, like mine. Instead of his usual tuxedo, he had a black shirt on with jeans.

Standing beside him was my uncle Leo. Bald, tall, always wearing a tux. He had a white stick in his mouth that blew out smoke. Mommy said that it's a dangerous white stick, but I always thought it was cool.

"Kennedy, are you ready for training?" Uncle Leo walked over to me and crouched down. He placed his big hand on my small shoulder, engulfing it.

"What are we doing today?" I asked curiously. My eyes traveled to my father who opened the black box.

Upon opening, my father reached in and grabbed a small object. Immediately, I drew a connection to what the object was. A gun. My dad had pulled out a small gun and held it firmly in his hand. I felt uncontrollable tears welt in my eyes. I don't like guns.

"Don't cry Kennedy. It's only a gun." Uncle Leo tried to soothe me, rubbing my shoulder. But sadly, it didn't work.

"Daddy, why do you have a gun?" I turned my head away from the direction of my father.

"You're gonna learn how to use it today baby." My dad's voice was quiet and gentle. But I know he doesn't feel bad.

"I don't want to." I shook my head in protest. I never wanted to see a gun again, let alone touch one.

"Come on baby, you're getting to the age that men will look at you and want to touch you without your consent. You need to protect yourself." My dad replaced uncle Leo in front of me, and pulled me in for a hug. I stood stiff.

"No daddy, please don't make me. Remember what happened to mommy?" I dug my face into his hard shoulder.

"That's exactly why I'm teaching you. So you can protect her next time." My dad slowly rubbed my back in effort to comfort me.

"Please daddy." I cried into his shoulder. I can't do this. Not now, not ever. It's too painful.

"Just try for me baby, that's all I ask." My dad picked my head up and wiped the tears from my small cheeks.

I nodded. I couldn't let my dad down. He was only protecting me. Even if it's going to hurt me. So, without thinking, I slowly grabbed the gun from his hand and kept it in my small one. I could barely hold it up, it was so heavy.