a lifeline

14 (edited)

victoria slowly started to wake up and was slightly confused when she woke up in the car, she didn't have a chance to say anything though as she ended up passing out which was probably because she hadn't eaten all day, when she next woke up she was in erin's arms as she walked through the apartment door.

"mm hey.." victoria whispered.

"hey! you okay tori, did i wake you?" erin asked.

"no no, i woke up in the car but i passed out" victoria replied as erin set her gently on the sofa.

"you passed out? everything okay?" erin had both a confused and worried expression across her face.

"yeah its fine i just need to eat something i think" victoria nodded and rested her head against the back of the sofa.

"ill order something, what do you feel like eating?" erin said as she grabbed her phone out of her pocket and looked at victoria.

"hm im not too hungry so ill just have something small like chicken salad.." victoria smiled.

"okay im thinking pasta, you want a drink?" erin asked smiling back at victoria.

"uhh redbull? please." victoria replied.

"yeah sure, ill order now so it should be like an hour?" erin then dialed the number for a takeout then placed the order.

"what will i tell my friends or just anyone really.. you know when my dad gets arrested and you become my guardian.." victoria turned to face erin.

"don't worry kiddo, they'll understand and i'm sure they'll be happy that your getting help but if you want i could help you tell them?" erin grabbed victoria's hand and rubbed it reassuringly.

"yeah okay.." victoria sighed.

"whats up tori?" erin questioned picking up on the teens obvious stress and sadness.

"it's just... you saw the cctv footage right? you saw my dad made me do that, i had no choice he had a gun on me! i didn't want to do that. i still remember every detail and i feel like he's haunting me, i just want everything to stop. the abuse, the thoughts, the urges, the panic attacks just everything" victoria noticed her breathing getting heavier and tear's started to well in her eyes just begging to escape.

"hey hey hey, deep breaths yeah? just focus on you breathing come here tori." erin gestured for victoria to go and sit between her legs so that she could place her arms around the teenager in order to comfort her in anyway possible.

victoria did exactly what erin told her and rested her head against erin's shoulder, she just wanted to be okay.. to feel like her whole world wasn't crumbling to pieces.

"i-i just can't do this anymore its so hard erin.. i promise you im trying so hard but i can't" victoria said as she finally gave in to the tears that so desperately wanted to spill as they fled down her cheeks.

"hey i know you are and im so so proud of you okay? i know it isnt easy but things will get better it will take time but things will start to improve and you'll be so much happier tori" erin wrapped her arms around the girl and rubbed her wrists carefully not wanting to hurt her.

"can i smoke one of my joints? please. i promise i'll stop i just need to calm down and get myself into a different headspace before i do something ill regret" victoria begged, she did not want to act on the unpleasant thoughts swarming in her head.

"okay.. as long as you promise you'll ease yourself away from the drugs and alcohol yeah? it isn't good for you but as long as we ease you away from everything then the easier it'll be on the both of us." erin embraced the girl for a bit and began remembering the way she used to rely and drugs at this age and how she used them as an escape too, only with victoria.. she was using drugs to try and help not feel things..