Saviors ; 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘥

130. ꕥ What's Left Behind

My back was firmly pressed against the metallic wall behind me, legs tucked against my chest, with my arms loosely wrapped around them. I stared straightforwardly at the floor, my face holding a stoic expression and dried-up tears that decorated either of my cheeks. The Iliad sat a couple of feet away from me, my eyes begged desperately to look over at the faded book lying innocently on the floor, but I refused because every time I looked at it, I saw him. My mind was anywhere but this room in a daze; the last few events had become like a blur, everything was jumbling together, and I had no idea how to organize my thoughts.

The room around me was an utter mess, looking like a tornado had traveled through — in a sense, it did. Sheets from the beds were thrown carelessly on the floor, some hanging off the mattress where they had been neatly tucked underneath. The belongings from mine and Bellamy's bags were sprawled negligently on the ground, his a good distance from me. All the drawers were pulled open; I had been looking for anything to use to break out of here — there was nothing. The only thing I found useful was a pipe from one of the bed frames I had ripped off in pure and unseemly rage.

That piece of metal was still resting near the door only after I had dropped it when I successfully used it to break open the small window on the door. I had reached my arm between the broken razor-sharp glass, cutting myself in the process as I tried to get to the lock on the other side. Just my luck, my arms were too short, and I could not reach the lock. All remaining hope that I could get myself out of here left my system at that very moment.

As I pulled my arm out again, I cut myself, now having a matching cut with the one on my bicep when trying to reach first. Only this cut ranged from the middle of my inner elbow all the way down to my wrist, dangerously close to the radial artery, threatening to reach it, severing the artery and spewing more blood than already gushing out my arm. That same arm, as it was wrapped around my legs, still bled profusely, the dark red substance soaking into my pants, but that was the furthest problem or thought on my mind.

Breathing had never been so difficult until I found myself backing into the furthest wall from the door and sliding down it to the position I found myself in now. My breaths had become shallow and erratic as the panic truly set in that I was trapped inside this metal box with no way out, just like how it was in the Skybox. The two rooms were all too similar for it not to be terribly familiar; this time, however, I didn't have the comfort of Harper being here with me.

From then on, I'd sat here, unable to get my breathing under control as I still took uneven breaths, my lungs not receiving as much oxygen as they should. It was here where the initial anger and rage I felt dissipated, being replaced by an emotion I was not at all familiar or comfortable with the feeling. This utter sadness and incredulity were taking over my body — it was overwhelming. Disbelief had settled in my stomach, disbelief that Bellamy would've done something of this caliber. There was no way he was just going to leave me here; there had to be a perfectly good explanation for all of this. He was going to come back — he had to.

Bellamy left me. He god damn left me. Those words were reluctantly swirling around in my head; my adamant refusal to believe them was the only thing pushing the words back, as far away as they could possibly get.

The dead silence alone was enough to drive me crazy, and all my thoughts were adding to it. I kept replaying the scene in my mind, head lulling to the sight of the bed Bellamy and I had decided would be ours, the memories of our last moments together playing. All of a sudden, he and I were there; he was talking to the baby, telling them how much we already loved them. We were sharing that tender kiss, the one I thought had assured me everything was going to be okay when in reality, everything was far from it. I watched the scene unfold as I turned around, oblivious to what Bellamy was doing, watching terrified as I ran up to the door, shouting and begging for Bellamy to let me out.