Chapter 36: Doom

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LEXA POV

I can't believe this is happening. For years I've been looking out for my name. And now it's tarnished because I gave in to my urges. It hurts me to hurt Clarke like that but I have to. I can't destroy my career, and hers.

I watch as Clarke leave pushing away her friends. It hurts me watching that but I have to let her go.

Then suddenly I feel a sharp pain in my jaw. Octavia just punched me in the face. I sit up groaning as I watch Luna and Anya holding off Octavia.

Octavia: How dare you Lexa?! You fucking hurt my bestfriend!

Me: She had it coming Octavia.

Octavia: You're one ungrateful bitch. You don't fucking know what Clarke has gone through. You don't have the right to tell her to go back to her fucking life. And you have no right to tell her about herself.

Me: Do you think I don't know that Octavia? Of course I know! It hurts me that I pushed her away like that

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Me: Do you think I don't know that Octavia? Of course I know! It hurts me that I pushed her away like that. But I have to.

Raven: For you career? That's a stupid reason Lexa. You and the universe know that. You're stupid.

Anya: Okay, stop with that. I know Lexa did something stupid but can we at least hear what stupidity my sister is doing.

I sigh but thankfully they listened to Anya. We all went to the living room to sit and talk.

Raven: Speak before I punch you right where Octavia hit you.

Luna: No more hitting please. Lexa, explain.

Me: I had to say that because just as I was about to call the directors for FTWD, Titus called me. Threatening to expose Clarke if I don't break-up with her.

Anya: What?!

Raven: who the hell is Titus?

Luna: He's Lexa's first manager. We fired him all of a sudden because he was too much for the team. And Lexa needed to breathe. That's why we let him go. And it's the reason why we were looking for a new team.

Anya: What did he want?

Me: He wants me to take him back, promising that he can take all of this issue away. He admitted that he was the one who spied on me and sent the photos to justsomepaps.

Octavia: Is this some kind of revenge for him?

Me: Apparently so. I have to give in to him or else Clarke will be exposed. I can't have him ruining Clarke's reputation. She has already gone through so much to maintain Grounders.

Octavia: why didn't you just say that to her Lexa? Clarke would understand. Heck, she'll probably have some crazy idea to fix this.

 Heck, she'll probably have some crazy idea to fix this

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Me: I don't know. The pressure just got to me and I was worried. I have deep feelings for Clarke and I don't want her to be exposed just because she's dating me.

Raven: You love her, don't you?

I look at Raven. Do I love Clarke?

Me: I think I do, Raven. I have these feelings towards Clarke that I can't understand.

Octavia: Then talk to Clarke. Tell her what's really happening.

I nod and the group came to give me a tight hug. The five of us started to look for Clarke. Ignoring the fact that Titus keeps on calling me.

We've been searching for Clarke for almost 4 hours now and she hasn't been home or anywhere we thought she might be.

Me: Do you guys have any idea where Clarke might possibly go?

Raven: No. We've searched every single possible location Clarke can go. Even Mama Griff is searching for her.

Me: This is all my fault. I shouldn't have said those things to her.

Octavia: Clarke's going to be okay Lexa. She's a fighter. She just need a breather. Come on, let's get you home. Maybe Clarke's waiting for you.

I nod in agreement. But it doesn't stop me from worrying.

Clarke where are you?

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End of Chapter 36

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