Survive ( twd carlgrimes)

Chapter 50

MADISON'S POV.

The past three days passed into one massive blur. Time flew by because we dreaded it coming, we knew what was coming and sure enough Bob died not even a day after the massacre in the church. Sasha has not been herself since and I don't blame her and I certainly don't judge her. Considering everything, she's holding herself together better than most people would.

I feel a lot better and although my head throbs in pain every now and again I can't complain. I've been able to laugh death in the face once more. Even now, when I can walk around without my head exploding from pain, something doesn't feel right. Something makes me feel sick to my stomach but I guess maybe it's just the shock of everything and my body and mind playing with me as it tries to process everything that's happened.

The company has made my recovery better than I could've imagined although the sadness from a new loss still lingered thickly in the air, making you feel guilty if you found something someone said amusing.

Now was not a time for laughter and joy when Sasha is in so much pain. She tends to keep to herself and I guess that's all we can do. Whatever she has to process can only be done alone.

We decided yesterday that we would move on from the church tomorrow. Thank god for that, I'm done with this place, it's depressing.
Nobody has mentioned the secret Gareth exposed and for that I'm thankful. It's nobody's business anyway.
Although, Nick is still mad about me and Carl so he doesnt talk to me much, but I don't care. He'll get over it.

Rick has sat with me for dinner as we spread out whats left of our rations from the food bank. He chat in small bursts, he's not a big talker really, but that's okay. The past few days I haven't been either. My head is healed but I still feel uneasy and I'm not sure why. Any tension that had been between Rick and I has slowly dissolved, not completely but enough that we don't bicker every time one of us breathe funny.

Today, I wake up when the light shines through the window shutters, shining directly onto my face. I squint as I sit up and look around the room. I'm completely alone but I hear everyone talking outside. I feel sick again, the strong, overpowering tension in my stomach, squeezing and squeezing, threatening to erupt.

I slowly pick myself off the ground but before I can reach the door I feel my stomach contact. I double over and clutch my belly, holding my breath in hopes that I won't get sick. When the nausea passes I gasp for air again and with a groan, force myself to stand up straight again.

I twist the door handle and push the door open so I can join the others at the alter. I try to breathe out the pain in my stomach. I take a seat next to Maggie, Michonne and Abbie
"Morning." I say to them and slowly sit down, criss-crossing my legs.
"Nice of you to wake up." Daryl comments.
"Some people like to catch up on their beauty sleep. Something you should consider." I mock.
A round of "oooohh's" applied my responce and I force a smile.
He rolls his eyes but passes me a tin. "Eat."
I don't look into the tin in fears I'll projectile vomit down the aisle.
I shake my head.
"Not hungry." I wave my hand, gently swatting it away.

"Madison you need to eat." Rick insists.
I grab the spoon from the tin and shovel the contents into my mouth without looking at what it is, swallowing immediately so I don't have to taste it.
"Fresh air could do you good." Maggie suggests, eyeing the front door.
I nod. "Sure." I mumble.

"Anyone want to go with her?"
I watch as Carl's head shoots up but quickly ducks back down when Nick turns to glare at him.
"I'll go with her. I need to hunt anyways."
"Maybe you can win an arrow off me after all. Not likely though." I smirk.

"Can I come?" Abbie asks.
I hesitate. I don't want to tell her no but, I really want to tell her no. I don't like her out there if she doesn't have to be.
"I don't kno-"
"Jesus Maddie, you're not serious? I'm in better shape than you right now." She huffs.
"Fine then. Maybe you can actually learn how to shoot that gun you've been hiding in your waistband for the past three days."
Her cheeks turn red.
"Fine." She snaps.