A Barmaid before the world fucked up, now a fighter for survival. Clare Aven, was never anything special, the only thing she was good at was making drinks and seducing men. The one best thing her Military father taught her was how to use a gun. It d...
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*smut*
I stand up deciding maybe I could go get us something to eat, dinner has probably only just started so there would be plenty of food left still. I relish in the feeling of being able to go down and get food again, that horrible month in those cells, drove me crazy.
I would often dream about the sort of foods they were serving while I was locked away, tried to imagine the taste of a burger or stew as I forced that horrid dog food sandwich into my system. I shiver at the thought, if the old me knew what would happen to her in this new world she probably would have shot herself in the head by now. I'm surprised that I haven't done so, after my father and then what David did and just the dead pricks, really gets to a person.
I hear Negan get up too, I walk past the bed, stopping to put my shoes on, Negans hand grabs my own. I stand straight and look up at him confused, he wraps his hand around my neck, his thumb up against my chin and his index finger is around my cheek, keeping my head in place. The task of putting my shoes on now completely wiped from my memory as I stare into his beautiful hazel eyes.
My eyes search his face curiously, I place my my right hand on his elbow to support his arm that's holding my face, my other hand grips onto the hem of his shirt.
He lowers his head down towards mine, his lips sealing against my own, he kisses me slowly and passionately, expressing lots of different emotions at once. I respond back kissing him just as feverishly, putting my sorrow and apology into the kiss and most importantly giving him love.
His hand not holding my face, slides around my waist and presses in the middle of my back forcing me closer against his body, I moan against his mouth, this feels so right. I remove my fingers from his shirt and slide them into his hair, pulling slightly.
His tongue reaches out touching my lips gently, asking me for permission, I open my mouth letting him in, I slide my tongue against his, exploring his mouth as he does the same. Soon enough we are fighting for dominance and he wins just like he always will do, I submit myself to him letting him take the lead.
Negan lifts me up off of the ground, I wrap my legs around his waist and he lays me down on to the edge of our bed, I hold his head and run my fingers through his hair. He stands up straight leaving me laying on the bed with my legs still around his waist.
He unbuttons my jeans and slowly slides the zipper down, I watch him carefully, as heat fills my body and the desire sets in. Negan grabs at the waist line and pulls my jeans and panties away from my skin, I let him go with my legs and he pulls my jeans off entirely.
Negan spreads my legs apart and steps closer to me, sliding down his own pants and releasing his already erect member, he slides himself inside and I groan at the size of him. I had almost forgotten how good this feels with him. Negan keeps to a slow rhythm teasing me over and over.
He brings me to the edge of orgasm before pulling out and waiting and then going back to fuck me again, I beg with him to just pound me. I finally get to the point where I'm sick of his antics and pushing him out of me. I stand hurriedly, forcing him down on to his back on the bed.
I climb up on to him and seat myself on his hard cock, my eyes rolling into the back of my head, I ride him hard and fast, giving him no time to adjust to our new position, I quickly orgasm around his cock, falling forward onto him.
Negan fucks himself up into me, until he reaches his own climax and finishes in me, groaning my name lowly, I almost pass out on top of him, but he moves me off of him and he heads for the bathroom. Coming back with a wash cloth, cleaning me up of our messes.
"I'll go get dinner, you stay hear and get some rest or even a shower, I had one when we got back." Negan leans down and kisses me softly before leaving me alone. I decide to do as he suggested and head for the shower, looking forward to the hot water that awaits.
It's only then that I let myself cry, letting the tears wash away with the water, I cry for those men we lost, wondering if we could have saved them somehow. I hate how my emotions constantly get the best of me, I'm always going through something horrible, even when it seems like it's going to be okay.
I get this strange feeling that the Sanctuary won't last and I'll end up on my own again, it's only a matter of time before it happens. I want to be able to believe that Negan can protect this place forever, that this will be permanent, but it seems even inside the dead clad fences that we aren't safe, people still die.
I wash myself quickly leaving the shower and heading into the room, Negan sits at the table, waiting for me to return before eating, he gives me a big grin and I can't help but give him a soft smile. I dress in some comfy pjs before joining him over at the table and though this seems like a time to be happy, I'm not.
The reminder of what I did plagues me, a living nightmare that will never go away. Something that I'll forever catty to the grave, shadows of faces of people I once knew.
