Babygirl.

Trouble in Paradise

I wake up to the soft glow of sunshine feeding through the curtains, I'm wrapped tightly in Negan's embrace, usually he's up much early then this and it makes me wonder how well he actually sleeps.

I try to awkwardly slip from his grasp to check on Axl, after I manage to lift my head I see he is still fast asleep too, I let myself settle back in, it's not often I get to relax like this, Axl is always up so early.

I snuggle back into Negan's chest and it's only then I realise he's not wearing a shirt, it's been so long since I've seen him like this, I run my hand gently and slowly down his chest, watching the hair on his chest spring back as I pass over it. I look back up at his sleeping face, he really is very handsome, I wish we never ended up the way we did, so much time was wasted between us.

I lift my hand and carefully slide my index finger across his lips, he stirs in his sleep, his golden hazel eyes are soon watching me tiredly. I smile softly at him, the sunshine making his eyes look like they have flecks of gold in them.

"I'm sorry for waking you." I tell him as I run my hand along the side of his face, pushing his hair out of his face.

"I don't mind, as long as I've got you." His smile brightens up the whole room and warms the inside of my chest.

I lean into him and kiss him passionately, letting myself get carried away as he places a hand on my ass and forces me against his groin, I moan at the delightful feeling of his hard on grinding against me. An annoying thought ruins the mood for me when I remember what he did to those people, how malicious he was.

I break the kiss and unwrap my leg from around his waist and when I look at his confused face this time the golden flecks have disappeared, revealing the man he has always been. Not some Prince Charming that I've dreamed up over the years that I've been on my own.

"I'm sorry, I just don't think I'm ready for this Negan, I need some time." The hurt expression on his handsome face almost makes me regret my decision, but I need to sort through my priorities first. Axl being the most important on my rather long list of things, getting back with Negan unfortunately isn't that high up.

Negan slides out of the bed and gets dressed, I can literally see the disappointment in his movement and I sigh heavily. Negan carefully scopes Axl off of the couch waking him up.

"I'll take Axl down with me while I get you some breakfast." He doesn't give me time to complain as Axl distracts him as they leave the room. I frown at the now closed door, I'm a little concerned that more and more people are being able to see Axl and with Negan too, it doesn't take a scientist to know that they are related.

I decide to let it go, stewing over it is not going to make me feel better about it at all, I open the side draw and found a empty journal and pen. I may as well start sorting through my head and work out what's more important to me at the moment.

By the time Negan gets back I've filled about ten pages in the book, trying to prioritise things and work out how to deal with the mess Negan has created, he sets the tray of food in front of me on the bed.

"I can sit at the table, I know you don't like people eating in your bed." I tell him making an effort to move, but he's quickly at my side and kissing the top of my head.

"It's fine, I know you're not a messy eater and won't make a mess. Anyway what have you been up to?" Negan asks going to grab the journal I left opened but face down on the bed, I'm quick to snatch it up though.

"I'm just, putting some thoughts down, plans if you will, about the Sanctuary." I awkwardly try to be vague with my response but without lying in doing so. Negan looks rather puzzled by my answer and I'm dancing on the inside, for once I might have some real solutions that could work for this place.

"Plans? What kind of plans?" He asks genuinely interested in what I have to say, but I'm going to make him work for it, for once, he's always so used to getting what he wants. If I even have a chance in having a leadership voice that I need to stand up to him.

"Just plans to help improve the Sanctuary, a women's touch if you will." I joke about it to hopefully keep his mind off of it for now, I don't wish to take over the Sanctuary, I just want to help Negan lead this place to a better option, a safer option. Before things get to out of hand with the other communities.

Negan sits with Axl at the small dining table that we managed to fit in his room, I carefully eat my breakfast trying to avoid making any mess. I continue to write and doodle in the little journal, filling it with all my ideas. More and more coming to mind as I think about things longer.

Enhancing our own food growth would do so much better for the community, then we could stop taking from others, maybe even build a greenhouse to improve our crops.

Suddenly loud pops echoing around the room and my instincts to investigate kick in, I rush towards the door, but before I pull it open I turn back to Negan.

"Stay with Axl!" I don't give him time to argue as I leave, but the look of rage is clear on his face. I quickly rush through the halls and come face to face with a women, her skin a beautiful caramel colour.

She lifts a gun up towards me, but I'm quick to react not letting her get the jump on me, I disarm her. Saviours soon fill the hallway blocking her every escape, Negan steps around me and I almost jump at his presence. I can tell he is seething inside, his body language telling me how mad he is.

I look behind me to see if I can see Axl but he's no where in sight, Negan must have left him in the room by himself and that makes me just as mad as him. I don't even listen as he talks to the women, his men are soon escorting her away, to where I assume is the cells.

Negan turns on his heel to look at me, but I'm quick to walk away, back to his room, to see if my son is okay, I can't believe Negan just left him on his own, doesn't he trust me to handle things. I hear Negan's heavy footsteps close behind me, I open the door and see Axl sitting on the floor playing with his toys.

I go over to him and pick him up, kissing him on the forehead, deciding it's his bed time now, I carry him over to the couch and help settle him in for the night, I even read him his favourite bedtime story. Negan went straight to his mini fridge and is pouring himself a drink, by the time I finish with Axl he is about to pour out his third drink.

I walk over to him and take the freshly filled tumbler, drinking all the liquor inside, knowing I'm going to need it for this next conversation with Negan, I'm surprised he didn't even try and stop me from drinking his drink.