Babygirl.

Crazy in love.

After Negan and I had gone to bed at some point that night, I was tortured with night terrors, one was about my arguement with my mother and then it would shift and she would be one of those dead pricks, lurching at me, trying to tear me apart.

Then it would change again and it was the day I killed my father and him coming back to life all decayed telling me he will never be proud of me. Others were of David taking advantage of me or some were of Bethany attacking me as her dead hands grab at my shoulders.

Soft kisses are pressed to my cheek and neck, I let my eyes open, I'm wide awake, having given up on sleep ages ago, it's still very early in the morning. Warm lips still press and suck at my neck, I roll over, wrapping my arms around Negans neck, pulling him in for a passionate kiss.

I decide I need him to make me forget about all the thoughts that are driving me to stay awake all night, I hook my leg up around his waist and roll us so I'm on top, during the night I had gotten to hot and had stripped off my clothes, making things easier for me now, he always sleeps naked too.

I slide down gently on to his length, gasping heavily, throwing my head back, I roll my hips against his, Negans hands explore my waist and breasts, playing with my nipples. He rolls us over, resting his forearms either side of my head, slamming his pelvis down against mine, hitting my G-spot deliciously each time he does it.

I moan his name, begging him to never stop, a series of profanities slip through his gritted teeth, as he hears me worship him.

"Fuck Babygirl, you are mine. Do  you fucking here me?" He growls into my ear heavily.

"As long as you are mine, only mine." His head lifts up and looks down at me as he continues to pound me, I reach up and hold his cheek, he tilts his head into it.

"I'm only yours from now on, only you can have me." My heart swells with his words and I pull him down into a passionate kiss, as I cum around his hard cock, he groans, hunching deeper into me, causing me to scream out in pure blindly pleasure.

Soon he is cuming hard inside me, his body stills above mine, I wrap my arms and legs around him, keeping him close and still inside me, enjoying the delicious weight of him on top of me. He rolls off of me after a while, I sigh blissfully and roll onto my side so I can cuddle into him.

I kiss his chest lovingly, he is the one good thing in this world for me, I don't ever want to lose him. 

"I love you." I say softly, not expecting him to answer back and he doesn't, I just need for him to hear me say it, this new world waits for no one and I don't know when I'll get the opportunity to say it again. He slips out of bed and I watch as he dresses swiftly, he comes back over to me and kisses my forehead. 

When I pulls away, I see it in his eyes that he loves me too, he's just not ready to say it and I understand that. He leaves with Lucille in hand, going to deal with whatever business that needs to be addressed today.

I get up and go shower, I need to be productive today, get my mind off all the negative things that's been going on, I decide I want to help out in the kitchen, I always enjoyed working in there before. There is no way I'm just sitting around doing nothing all day.

Once in the kitchens, I notice that Molly and Karen are in there, they are the closest I have to friends in this place, I get stuck straight into working, it's lamb casserole today. The day progresses quite quickly, Molly has started to cook the lamb and Karen and I are making bread rolls.

The scent of lamb hits me quick and I feel as if I'm about to throw up, I pull my shirt over my nose, the smell becoming to much.

"Hey? What's wrong?" Karen asks when she realises I've stopped working.

"The smell from the lamb, it's disgusting." I try and say without the smell getting to me, Karen and Molly look at each other before stopping what they are doing and coming over to me.

"Do you not like lamb? Molly asks curiously.
"I've always loved lamb, especially lamb roast which I used to have on Sundays. Today it just smells off." I say still feeling extremely nauseous.

"Have you been having sex?" Molly asks curiously, I just nod my head shyly at her.

"Have you had your period since being here?" Molly asks piecing things together slowly.

"I have yes, but now that I think about it not in the last few months I haven't." I frown as try and think about the last time I had my period, but it all seems so long ago.

"I think you should go see the doctor, like right now. We will be fine to finish up here." Molly tells me ushering me towards the door, I want to resist and continue helping and to honestly forget what they are trying to tell me.

I know I shouldn't put it off though, I nod my head at them and leave quickly, heading straight for the doctor. What if I am? What would I do? How would I tell Negan? Am I even ready for a baby?

I rush through the corridors my heart pounding with each step that draws me closer to the doctors office. I burst through the doors Dr.Carson is busy taking stock of the medication, he jumps as the door hits the wall.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to open it so hard, but I um uh need a test." I ask him awkwardly, he all but nods his head, like he does this often and I wonder how many times he does actually get asked.

"Go in the toilets, pee in this." He hands me a cup with a yellow lid, I go to the room off to the where he points to, when I go in it's a small toilet.

I nervously pee into the cup, I finish up in the bathroom pretty quick and hand the cup to Dr. Carson ready to just find out and go, he opens the pregnancy test and dips it into the cup, the minutes feel like hours as we wait for the results.

Dr. Carson removes the test and checks it over, staring at the results before saying anything to me, I grow impatient waiting for him to say something.

"So? What's the verdict?" I hear the tremor in my voice and at this point I don't know if I do or don't want to be pregnant, I bounce my knee as I sit in the doctors chair, still waiting for him to respond as he writes a few notes down.

"Well, Miss. Aven you are pregnant.".............