Mirio Togata

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Requested by: IdioticBaka

[A/N]: This is short, so I apologise! I hate taking 2-3 day breaks, but sometimes I just burn out?? I promise to sort the rest of the requests as quickly as possible!

Trigger Warnings: Anxiety/Depression, PTSD.

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Love was a miracle, but it could just as easily be a curse. Love at first sight was shallow, and undeserving of a future. That's what he always thought - nobody's soul lingered on the outside. You couldn't gauge their true colours, the deepest depths of their heart, from such a momentary glance.

For the most part, that still rang true, but...

"Oh, hey! You're awake already, (L/n)? How are you feeling?"

...you seemed to dance around those beliefs, with the beauty and grace to shame even Aphrodite herself. But perhaps love was too simple a term for this emotion? Or perhaps it was the only one capable of expressing such homely warmth, and the fluttering of his heart? He had practised a confession, but the moment he entered that hospital wing, all his real confidence disappeared. He couldn't put his own interests above yours, so instead, he set them aside.

If only your worlds had collided under different circumstances.

"Umm...I - n-not great...I had another nightmare." All things considered, you were hardly the picture of eloquence.

There were fresh beads of sweat clinging to your skin, and it seemed you had just recently been startled from sleep. You appeared slightly gaunt, nervous, and pained. Mirio dropped by on the regular, but clearly not enough to ensure that you were refreshed or well-fed. Were you avoiding meals on purpose? It was understandable, as a symptom of your acute anxiety - what the doctor classified as PTSD. Mirio couldn't fault you for it. Not that he ever would. You were already battling with internal blame, and had been for quite some time. The strength of your captors - of the villains who held you for ransom - was almost unparalleled. You couldn't have escaped, but sitting idly was a Hell in itself. You were forced to watch as the blood of the righteous pooled, as it splattered on to you. They shouldn't have been involved. Yes, it was technically their duty as heroes, but...

...why soldier through such agony, why willingly teeter on the precipice of death, for a simple civilian?

"Has the doctor prescribed you any medication for them? Is there anything I can help you with?" Mirio's smile waxed and waned like the moon cycle, although he tried desperately not to show it.

Play the jester.

Veil your grief.

"T-There's this one...um...Prazosin? But they want me to try CBT...I-I'm not sure though..." Your forlorn eyes swept over the bottle beside your bed.

Mirio was thankful for the conversation, and hopeful that his cheery personality (albeit now reduced to a weaker copy) would elicit a smile or a giggle. Small and shy worked for now, but soon he wished for an ear-to-ear grin, accompanied by a bout of hearty laughter. This was a goal he pursued with vigour, during each and every visit. He vowed that someday, in the not-so-distant future, his love would surface. Then you could rebuild your self-assurance, together. His offer of protection wouldn't fade, but extend to all aspects of your life.

He would exorcise all your demons.

This medication has a lot of side-effects. Headaches, weakness, blurred vision, nausea...will she be okay?

"I think talking to someone is a great idea! Have you ever done CBT before?" Oh, how sly of him - disguising his curiosity under the guise of 'just a hero aiding a civilian'.

He wanted to understand the intricacies of your life - if you were more susceptible to conditions like anxiety, depression and PTSD. He wanted to know your triggers, and keep you sheltered from them. You were the test it was imperative to pass, but to which he had dedicated dangerously little time.

Your head lowered in shame. "N-No...I always thought my problems would bother people...I was - I had more confidence...I wasn't...I wasn't like this."

Distress permeated your voice. Sorrow drew the tears from your eyes. Nerves caused you to flinch at every small movement. This wasn't right, nor was it fair, but the intensity shook your very core. The feeling that you were living on borrowed time, that fate had willed you to die, but you defied it...

You hadn't defied it alone.

"Hey, it's gonna be alright. I can ask to go with you, if you want?" Mirio's words couldn't incite even a spark of hope or joy.

The heroes hadn't saved you.

Rather, they had doomed you.

[Word Count: 731]

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