Stirb Nicht Vor Mir

Chapter 59

TIME SKIP-----------------------------------DECEMBER 17, 1997

Christoph, Paul, Flake, Oliver, Richard, Till, my mom, Nele, Marie Louise, Shelly, Robert, and Neil were the only people that came to the gender reveal. 

"Okay," I said as I grabbed the firework. 

"Blue for girl and pink for boy," Till said. 

"WHAT?!" I yelled. 

"Just kidding-boy is blue and girl is pink," Till chuckled. 

"I love that we're using fireworks for a gender reveal," Neil added.

"Okay, are you recording, Tina?" Richard asked. 

"3,2,1, GO!" My mom yelled. 

Till grabbed a lighter, lit it up, and the firework exploded. Blue dust filled the air and I started screaming. Neil hugged me and we all cheered. 

"I KNEW IT!" I yelled. "I SAW A DICK IN THE PICTURE!"

"He's going to have a long one," Neil whispered and I started laughing. 

"A BOY!" Nele screeched. "FINALLY!"

I laughed and we all went inside. My mom brought in a blue cake and we started eating it. 

"We have to start coming up with baby names," I nudged Neil in the shoulder. 

"NAME IT CHRISTOPHER!" Christoph shouted from across the room. 

"Totally!" I chuckled and shook my head. 

"We can look into it later," Neil took a bite of his cake. "This is good!"

"Dad, your birthday is coming soon!" I told him. 

"In a couple of days, yes," He picked up Marie Louise and sat her on his leg and fed her cake. 

"I can't believe I'm going to be a dad," Neil exhaled. 

"Me either," I took a bite of my cake. "Holy shit, Mom. This is good!"

"It's from the store," She winked and then Richard kissed her. 

"It still tastes good," He smirked. 

After we were all done, my mom yelled, "THE BABY SHOWER WILL BE ON MARCH 10!"

"How far are you?" Till asked after everyone left. 

"I think 22 weeks," I replied. 

The doorbell rang and Marie Louise got her stuff together. Till walked her over and Anja picked her up, then left right away.

"She's pissed," Till chuckled as he walked back over to us. 

"This year has gone by so fast," I said. 

"Seriously," Richard commented. 

"Adette?" Nele asked. 

"Hm?" I asked. 

"Does your stomach hurt?"

I shook my head and then gasped. I grabbed Nele's hand and put it on my stomach and she gasped too. 

"Neil, come here," I told him. 

I let go of Nele's hand and put Neil's hand on my stomach. 

"I can feel it kicking!" He chuckled.

Richard, Till, and my mom both felt it.

"This is weird-having people touch your stomach," I shuddered and then gasped. "Nele, do you want to have a little girls' night tonight and spend the night?"

"DAD, CAN I?!" She asked Till. 

"Tina, is that fine with you?" He asked my mom and she nodded her head.

"YAY!" Nele squealed. 

After Neil left, it was about eight, so Nele and I went up to my bedroom and I painted her nails blue since she requested it. 

"I have a question, Adette."

"Fire away."

"What did it feel like to get raped?"

"Oh."

"I'm sorry-I shouldn't have-"

"No, Nele, it's fine. It hurt really bad-but not the physical pain. It hurt to know that I couldn't see what was going on and I couldn't stop it from happening. But,  it did physically hurt, too."

"How did you deal with it?"

"I talked about it and I beat my self up for it (which didn't help). I talked to my mom about it, too."

"I don't want to get raped, Adette."

"Trust me, you won't, okay?"

"But I bet you didn't think you were going to. I'm so sorry-that came off rude."

"It's fine and you're right: I didn't think it was going to happen. Especially since you're younger, you have to be more cautious (which sucks, I know), and you can't go places by yourself."

"I don't-Dad doesn't let me. It gets frustrating sometimes, but I understand where he's coming from."

"Yes-it's all out of love. I'm done!"

"They look pretty!"

I put the nail polish away. "Alright, let's get into our pajamas."

"I don't have any."

"I have some you could borrow (they're smaller)."

I handed her pajamas and then we changed into them and got into my bed and talked. I didn't think that my pain would return, but it did and it was ten times worse.