this was not your fault

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warnings: mentions of sexual assault

age: 16

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Y/N's POV

As usual in the evening, mom left for her walk about an hour ago. Typically, she tends to only be out for half an hour, but I guess today she took a more scenic route.

But with it getting darker, I'm starting to get slightly worried, just because I know the dangers of being out in the streets when it isn't light outside.

I'm sure she's fine, though. She would call me if anything was wrong.

For the next forty minutes or so, I spend my time pacing around the foyer. It's been almost two hours since she left and I've tried calling her, but it just went to voicemail every time.

Just as I'm about to send my thirtieth message to her, the door suddenly opens and I'm met with a mess of a mother.

She has mascara streaming down her face, her clothes don't look quite right, and she's gasping for air.

"Mom!" I exclaim and run over to her, immediately placing my arms protectively around her, but she pushes me away. "What happened?! Did you fall or something?"

She chokes on her sobs, trying to get words out, but ends up falling to her knees and collapsing against the wall.

"Y/N," she gasps, grabbing onto my hand. "C-call-" again, she's cut off by a cry. "Nat."

I have never in my life seen her in such a state before. I've seen her have breakdowns and panic attacks, but I don't know what this is.

"Nat's on a mission right now," I remind her as she continues to gasp for air. "Hey, hey," I speak softly, hoping that a more quiet tone will help her calm down. "Can you try to slow your breathing down? I'll breathe with you."

Around half an hour later, I finally manage to get her breathing back down to normal. But the tears haven't stopped.

Her complexion is pale, and her entire body is shaking. I don't know what got her so worked up, but I can only imagine it scared the shit out of her.

Once her sobs have died down a little, I push a bit further and repeat my earlier question. "What happened?"

Closing her eyes, clearly reliving the memory, she starts talking.

"Um," she clears her throat, "I-I went on a different route today. When I was walking through a dodgy alleyway..." she stops talking suddenly and starts taking some deep breaths.

Slowly and gently, I slide my hand onto hers, which has her palm pressed against the floor. She flinches slightly at the contact but soon relaxes as she realizes it's only me.

"I was gonna use my magic to get him off of me but I didn't want to cause a scene," she blurts out, her eyes still clenched shut.

"Get who off?!" I ask, significantly more concerned after her recent sentence. "Did someone hurt you?"

Mom shakes her head slowly and turns her hand over to clutch onto mine tightly.

"He... he touched me. A lot. This random guy who was walking behind me. God! I should've known he was up to no good. He was following me for ten minutes."

I'm quick to interrupt her self-blame. "Mama, no! Are you kidding?! This is not your fault in any way shape or form. Do you want me to call the police?"

Silent tears still falling down her cheeks, she shakes her head. "Not right now. Later, I will, though."

I nod in response, "What can I do? What do you need?"

"I really need a shower."

"I don't think you can do that just yet. When you call the police and if they decide to do a forensic interview, they'll need DNA. I'm assuming he didn't stop at just your clothes?"

She lets out a strangled sob at the conversation. I'm sure this isn't easy for her.

"No, no. He went under," she cries, hitting her head against the wall behind her.

"Hey, stop that," I tell her, putting my hand there to stop her from hurting herself.

"Maybe if I just wore less tight clothing then-"

"Mom. Stop. This was not your fault. Not at all. You hear me?"

Too tired to argue, she nods as another tear slowly slides down her cheek.

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you guys i cried so much over the live signing yesterday it was so cute!

also can't wait to see lizzie on cbs laterrrr

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