wanda x daughter one shots

my little baby

age: 2 months

you guys i don't know how to write from a 2 month's old perspective but i just want this to be funny😭

also i couldn't write this without hearing the voice effect that everyone uses for their dog voiceovers on tiktok haha

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Y/N's POV

For some reason, my mom thinks it's okay to just leave me in a bedroom all by myself for two whole minutes. I don't know why she thinks that's acceptable, because clearly I'm meant to be tended to non-stop.

So in order to get my mother rushing back in here with a panicked face, I scream at the top of my lungs before letting those water things come out of my eyes because I'm hungry and I can't lie, it's starting to stink over here.

As it should be, my mom comes running in and picks me up and now I'm gonna scream even louder in her ear just to teach her a lesson.

"No, no, no, why are we crying, my little dove?" she asks me in that soft voice that always somehow calms me down.

"Oh, someone needs a diaper change," she says in a disgusted voice, but nonetheless carries me over to this table thing which I've learnt is the place where she takes whatever diaper I have on off, and replace it with a new one.

If you ask me, I should be placed on something a lot comfier than a fucking table.

What does that word even mean? Mom says it all the time.

Drops something on the floor, 'fuck.'

Spills some water, 'fuck.'

I start crying, 'fuck.'

She says it a lot.

Anyhow, once she's placed me on the table, I stop crying and instead start trying to kick her in the face because the woman left me on my own for too long.

But unfortunately, her super strong hand keeps my feet still as she uses the other to undo my diaper.

"Are you stinky? Yes you are, yes you are," she starts talking to me in this stupid high-pitched voice. Rude.

Once she's finished doing whatever it is that she does and has put on a fresh diaper (I smell a lot better now) I'm lifted back into her arms and held close to her chest.

Her chest is my favorite place to rest my head. I can hear her heartbeat and feel her warmth, it's the best.

Not to mention, my food source is there. And if she doesn't give me my food right fucking now, I will start wailing again.

"Hungry down there?" she asks, giving my belly a little tickle before pulling my thumb out of my mouth and sitting down in my favorite rocking chair.

After taking forever with all her faffing around, my lunch is finally revealed to me and I am unbelievably starving so I don't bother pacing myself.

"Woah, woah, little one," mama chuckles, "It's not going anywhere."

Oh yes it is. It's all going in my stomach.

"I love you so much, my little baby."

I love you, too, mama.

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i have a blood test at 9:40 tomorrow im gonna cry