I made my way to the office, the adrenaline fully leaving my body. Now I was a shell of a human, my emotions running on empty.
The fact that I was taking this on completely alone was breaking me from the inside out. I was trying to hard to keep myself together but I craved the feeling of comfort.
I wanted nothing more than a hug and a kiss from Colby.
I limped down the hallway and towards the infirmary so I could clean myself up.
It's been forever since I've done stitches and I've never done them on myself but I was all on my own.
When I got to the infirmary I grabbed all the stuff I would need, then sat on the bed.
"Fuck." I whispered, looking at the wound. I couldn't believe that I had been shot again and that I was having to deal with this all on my own.
I was feeling myself slowly starting to crumble under the pressure but was trying so desperately to keep it in.
"Okay, Jules." I whispered to myself then grabbed the tweezers to get the bullet out of my leg.
As I did this I groaned in pain, crying from how badly it hurt. My hands were shaking I was afraid I would go into shock from how much blood I've lost.
Once the bullet was out, I went to start doing the stitches.
My hands were shaking so badly that I couldn't thread the needle, which happened to be the breaking point for me.
I started to sob, letting my hands fall to the sides. I must have been really loud because after a couple minutes Nate was opening the door.
"Jules?" He asked as I sobbed. "I can't do this." I cried out. "What happened?" He asked as I bawled, not being able to answer.
"Hey...it's alright." He said and pulled me in for a hug. "I can't do this." I said and leaned into him, craving the comfort.
I liked to think I have been so strong throughout all of this. I was taking on this challenge without any guidance and without the love of my life by my side.
I was bound to have a break down eventually.
"I'm sorry you're going through this, Jules. You don't deserve this." Nate said, trying to comfort me as best as he could.
I ended up crying for a little while before Nate pulled away. "Are you gonna tell me what happened here? I guess you don't have to but it would be probably a good idea." He said and grabbed the suture kit.
"I got shot." I sniffled as he started to clean the wound. "I can see that. By who though?" He asked as I shook my head.
"I can't say." I said as he began to stitch the wound. "I can help you though, you can't do this alone." He said as I wiped my cheek.
"I made a deal with someone about getting Sam and Colby back but you can't tell anyone about it. We signed a contract." I said as he looked up at me. "A contract?" He asked as I nodded.
"Yeah, I know it sounds silly but I needed to be sure I wasn't going to get fucked." I said as he sighed.
"Makes sense. You're not supposed to tell me any of this are you?" He asked as I shook my head.
"No. So it stays here." I said as he nodded. "Promise me you're being safe." He said and finished stitching the wound.
"I promise." I said with a sigh. "Great. I think you've done enough for the day, so we should go back to the house." He said as I nodded.
"If I get summoned I have to go though." I said as he chuckled.
"I can't tell if Colby will be proud or angry with you doing this." He said as we stood up and went to leave the room.
