She didn't know

71

Ally

"Did you hear me?" Daniel asks, worry in his voice as he turns onto his side. His eyes burning a hole into the side of my face.

What do I say? That I've hidden the truth from you hoping I didn't have to mess with the peace that was finally coming into our lives. However slowly that may be it is getting better. A part of me hoped it wouldn't come up. That we could slide past all that. I mean what could I of said? Hey, when I was unconscious I saw the Moon Goddess and she told me your mom isn't your mom, she lied to you actually. Trevor's mom is your mom, My ex-husbands your brother, and my son is your nephew. You're like us and everything you've known is a lie...

So now after not saying anything, what do I say? Do I tell the truth? Or do I pretend to be as shocked as he is? I can feel his worry, his nervousness, hear his heart thumping in his chest. The silence stretching longer making me anxious trying to come up with something to say. I just don't know what the right thing to say is though.

"Yeah, I heard you." I swallow back my emotions before looking to my right at him. The look in his eyes nearly bring a tear to my eye. Faking a small smile I roll over onto my side facing him. Place my palm on his cheek and place a faint kiss on his lips. "I'm just really tired, can we talk about this tomorrow?"

Daniels eyes search mine, and I can't stand the pressure. Turning quickly I pull the blanket over my shoulder and get comfy. For a while only silence follows, until I feel Daniel's large hand slide across my hip. Squeezing onto my pale skin as he pulls me closer, into himself. I get butterflies in my stomach as the sparks from his chest touching my back erupt. His chin tucking in between the crook of my shoulder and neck. I can feel Amaris start to feel guilty, wanting to tell Daniel's wolf as much as I want to tell Daniel. I'm just not sure what the right way to go about this is.

"I love you." Daniel whispers, and there just like that I feel myself start to cave. We don't say those words, not often.

"Promise you won't get mad?" I mumble, trying to keep my voice even while on the verge of tears. I know I messed up, I wish I hadn't. I was selfish and I shouldn't of been, especially when it comes to him. He's my mate.

"What is it, Love?" I can feel Daniel frown against my neck.

"I knew." I whisper.

What feels like forever passes in utter silence. My heart is racing, and I'm waiting for the explosion of emotions that are rushing through him to stop but they never do. Wave after wave hitting Amaris and I hard knowing it is all my fault.

"Amaris don't feel bad. It's my fault, not yours."

"It does not matter, we are one."

Internally sighing I wait for Daniel to speak, to say anything. Instead the silence continues, no words spoken, no end to the emotional whiplash coursing through Daniel to me through our bond.

Then when everything starts to slow. The emotions all passed I'm only left feeling one. Confusion, laced with hurt as I feel him wonder. I'm waiting for him to start asking me questions. Why I didn't tell him. If I told anyone else. Yet he doesn't ask. Instead I start to feel the bed shift. Looking over my shoulder I watch as he rolls over, throwing his legs over the side of the bed.

"I'm going for a run." Daniel finally speaks. His voice low, almost broken. Hurt laced with his words.

Looking up at the back of his head I meet his eyes as he turns to look bad at me. A single tear falling from my eye. "I am sorry."

Nodding his head he makes his way to his closet. Closing the door behind him I stare at the door until he comes out in runners and a pair of black sweats, not even bothering to look my way as he walks out of our room.

With the sound of our door clicking I let myself cry. Pulling the comforter up and over my shoulder, cocooning myself. I know I have no right, I know I lied and hid this from him. I know his feelings matter more. It's my fault. I just can't help but feel alone. I wish he had just talked to me, yelled, anything.

Crying to myself I hadn't even noticed I'd drifted off until the sound of footsteps woke me. I listened as they grew closer. I could smell Daniels scent but he didn't say anything as I listened to him walking around the room. Hearing him pick up our clothes from last night, my shoes clattering together as he gathers them. The sound of his steps making my heart races as he walks towards the closet. Door opening and closing, bathroom door opening and closing. I listen closely and hear the shower starting and sigh out loud.

The silent treatment. Made worse by feeing his disappointment. I almost wish he'd stuck to the confusion, but I guess his run helped him settle on just one emotion. I wish it had been any other one but that. Anger would of been better, easier.

Forgoing anymore sleep I push the blankets off of me, sliding out of the big bed. I make my way to the closet, grabbing black leggings and an over sized green sweater I dress quickly hoping to slip out of the house before Daniel even finishes in the bathroom.

Sliding some black leather ankle boots on I listen for the shower. Hearing it still running I slip out of my closet and quickly make my way downstairs. Quietly shutting the doors behind me. Tiptoeing down the stairs, trying not to wake anyone. I reach the bottom and basically bolt out the front door. Each step away from the pack house feeling lighter yet heavier on my heart.

Where to now?

The sun rises and birds start the chirp around me. Hours have passed, I'm not sure how many. Yet I continue to walk. Still trying to decide where to go. Who can I even talk to? Should I go tell Trevor the truth? Does he already know? He's hidden so much from me it wouldn't be surprising? Or do I go see Kelly or Gregg? Kelly's his cousin, maybe not blood but she's still his family. Would she even be open to listening to me? Seeing me at all? Did he already tell her? Then there's Gregg, his beta and his best friend. Mine truthfully as well but I also hid this from him too. Would he be offended I didn't come to him? Would he be mad I hid it from Daniel?

So many questions, and not a single answer. I guess that's how Daniel feels too, except mine are my own fault.

Deciding to head to Trevor's I think of ways to tell him. Should I start by telling him my dream or meeting or whatever it was? Should I just be straight forward and to the point? I've never been one to beat around the bush, but I think people are forgetting this is all new to me. I still don't fully understand these visions or dreams or whatever they are. I know what the Moon Goddess told me was true. I felt it inside me, even if part of me wished it wasn't. It made sense, that they were twins, that being why I felt attracted to them both. Even before becoming a wolf I thought Trevor was going to be the only man I ever found so attractive. Daniels equally so, but darker and mysterious on the outside. Where Trevor's darkness and mystery has always been internal. Trevor's looked kind, charming and strong, and he was but not like Daniel. Daniel was truly kind, and I'd lied to him. I'm just hoping he's strong enough to overcome my deceit. Trevor on the other hand lied to me our whole relationship, considering everything he hid from me he couldn't get to mad, could he?