Chapter 84

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Dedication: everyone that was able to go to #SLFLBrisbane because I wasn't allowed to and I'm actually really torn up about it because they've legitimately saved me.

The picture is my baby😍😍🐶

Confession time: When I was around 10, my celebrity crush was Kevin Bacon. I thought he was the shit and the best human alive.

My Science class has a guy in the corner of the room that you can pull all his organs out and he wears a straw hat it's great

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Recap:
He gently tilts my chin up so I'm facing him and I wince and try to pull away; my eyes are all puffy and red, I can just feel it, and I'll be a snotty mess.

But he just ignores all that and gently kisses the tear stains on my cheeks.

"Beautiful girls shouldn't cry." He whispers.

*****

"I need
{someone to send me a text message saying good morning and later, goodnight; or to let me wrap my arms around them as their eyelashes flutter as we gaze at the stars above our heads; someone who will whisper 'I love you,' and mean it}
sleep."
- shades of blue by julixtta

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We somehow end up on his bed after he says that. Not doing anything sexual, of course, just lying there. His back is against the headboard of his bed, his legs sprawled out in front of him. I'm situated in between his legs, leaning back against his front. I can feel hard muscle rippling underneath my back every time he takes in a breath and I'm living for it.

His hands are in my hair, playing with it, tugging it softly and every now and then he'll place a soft kiss on the top of my head.

I've settled down by now, a small whimper escaping my lips every few minutes but they're quickly silenced by Shane's soft kisses.

He taps my back gently and I lean forward, confused and he removes himself from my body and walks over to his desk where his CD player and laptop is situated. While he busies himself over there, I remember the multiple times we FaceTimed and Skyped. The good times.

My mind flashes back to the first time we Skyped.

"You're not beautiful," tears stream down my cheeks as he leans forward. "Because you're fucking gorgeous."

My attention is brought back to the present when a very familiar tune begins playing.

"5 Seconds Of Summer? Really?" I mutter as the sounds Safety Pin fills the room and he gives me that side smile of his, making butterflies appear in my stomach.

"I bought this album a while ago because I know you love them," he replies and walks back over, re-situating himself between my back and the headboard.

I search my brain but come up with a blank. "I don't remember telling you that," I murmur and lean against his stomach. His arms hesitantly snake around my waist, giving me time to reject his hug but I grab his hands and pull them around my body, accepting the hug. He lets out a shaky breathe and I bite my lip.

God I love him so much.

You know how many girls he's probably done this with?

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