Loving Brian | B.C

Part 52: she would be me

//brian//

She's beautiful. Beyond beautiful.
It's the first time I saw a glimpse of her full body, seeing her in all her beauty. Like I once said, she's skinny but not too skinny. Just perfect. You can see she lookes after herself and she cares about how she looks. There must be something behind it. Why she cares so much. Why she cares about her appearance when it's just me.

We rarely talked whilst being in the pool, mostly stared up at the sky and looking at the stars as they slowly, one by one, appeared in the sky. She floated in the middle of he pool, staring up. She has a lot on her mind, still. I just wish she'll talk. I walked closer to her, "What do you see?" "In the stars?" I nodded, seeing the small smile awakening on her lips.

"I see your freckles." She chuckled, making me laugh. "What? Why?" "Because their beautiful. You might not like them but they are on your face, scattered around like constellations in the sky. The stars. They are beautiful, so are your freckles." She smiled. I felt my cheeks burning, butterflies in my tummy going wild. I floated next to her, the top of her hand brushing against mine as I paddled to stay above. "You can't float?" I shook my head, laughing.

She stood up straight and placed her hands down on my back, lifting me up. "Look up. Focus on one star." She said in a soft tone. I searched for the brightest one, locked my eyes on it and felt my body coming to an ease. "Did you find it?" I looked back at her, my body staying in the same floating feeling. "I did." My voice soft as I spoke the words, looking in her eyes. All the stars captured in them.
How can I possibly find one star in them? I just look at her. She's the brightest star.

She floated next to me again after helping me. A small sigh left her lips. "Do you think that if I drown he'll miss me?"
"No." She looked at me with confusion in her eyes. "But I will." We swam to the side of the pool, resting on the edge. Her arms were crossed up and she leaned her chin on her forearm, looking away. "Do you ever, you know, regret it? Daniel?" She shook her head, "I'll never regret him, or say that I wish I never met him because once upon a time he was exactly what I needed."

I nodded, understanding. "But you were brave enough to say goodbye, Tahnée. So life will reward you with a new hello." "Did I really say goodbye?" She looked at me with a hard look of fear in her eyes. I turned to her, confusion now in my eyes. "What do you mean?" She shook her head. "No, tell me." "It's nothing Brian." "Tahnée, the fear in your eyes tell me that it's not just something to forget about. What's going on?"

"He hurt me Brian."
"I know, but you need to move o-" "No, not like that, he hurt me. He really hurt me Brian." And that's when it all fell in place. Her fear, her heartache and everything. "What did he do?" She just shook her head, "I'll rather tell that to you later. I don't want to ruin the night." "Did he just abuse you?" "Something like that, look I'm sorry but it's not really what I want to talk about right now I just-" I took her hand in mine, "It's okay. I understand."

We tried to quickly change the subject and have fun again but the stinky atmosphere is still hanging in the air. And the thought of whatever that bastard did to her is in the back of my mind.
A wind came up just as we got out of the pool and I saw Tahnée shivering. "Are you okay?" "Just a bit cold. But I'll warm up when we go inside." I chuckled at her, knowing she's secretly screaming of the cold inside. "Come with me." She followed me all the way to the hall and down to my room where I gave her one of my hoodies and a pair of sweatpants.

"Will they fit me?" "Trust me, just try them on." I laughed and she walked in to the bathroom across the hall.

-

//tahnée//

I told him that Daniel hurt me, but I'll spare the story for another time. I really want to enjoy this time I have with him, and not just spoil it by some heart disturbing story.

He gave me a pair of his sweatpants and a hoodie to get dressed in. I disappeared in to the bathroom just across the hall and got dressed.
His clothes. It smells of him. I stood there for a while, just curling up in the scent of him and imagining it's his arms around me. Holding me.

I opened the door and walked over to his room, once again, catching him without his shirt. But it's nothing that I haven't seen before by now. I took a running start and leaped, falling flat on his bed. He laughed at me as I curled up to his pillow. "Warmer?" "Not entirely. Come here." He pulled his shirt over his head and got a dark blue jacket on over the grey shirt. He lied down next to me and this time I curled up to him instead of a pillow.

"A bit better." I smiled, feeling his chest vibrating as he laughed. "You're something else Tahnée." He said but still wrapped his arms around me. Holding me close to him.
I could hear his heartbeat, the rhythm of his breathing made me tired. Sleepy. I closed my eyes and drifted further in to the feeling of his embrace. I can really say I'm thankful for the friend he is to me. It's like years of friendship that we created in just a few months. I trust him, with all I have. He's all I have here. And I know, I really know, he's the last one who will ever betray me. With anything.

"Brian! Dinner is ready!" His mother yelled from the kitchen and I groaned, having to escape from his embrace. "She makes the best food." He said, trying to get me off the bed. "I'm so tired." He didn't say anything after that, probably believing me. That I'm tired.
He brushed a small strand of hair in behind my ear. "After dinner we can come back."
"Okay good." I sat up almost immediately, hearing his kaughter from behind me as we made our way to the kitchen.

The smell of all the food filling the air and his mother's sweet sweet smile making the moment even more memorable.
He pulled the chair out for me. A smile on his face that can capture so many stories.

I see his eyes and I see his smile, I need him and I just think to myself... whoever the girl may be, whoever it was that hurt you this much, I hope they feel sorry. I hope they see what they left behind and that there's no way for them to ever return to your life.
But most of all, I wonder who the lucky girl will be, standing by your side through thick and thin.
I hope she loves you.
I hope she makes you smile the way you're smiling now, and I hope she appreciates the way you laugh, the way you're eyes light up when you talk about this things you love and all beautiful you see around you.

I hope she finds you as beautiful as I do. In all your wonder and in all your joy, I hope she sees you for who you are, not who she wants you to be.... I hope the 'she' will someday be me.

-

After dinner, like Brian promised, we went back to his room. Playing some silly games of thumb war and monopoly. Let's just say, he will be a great hotel manager one day.
He had me broke.

Broke of money, broke of love. All I admired in the time was the expression of joy on his face. His smile never leaving his lips and his eyes never stopped sparkling. "Why are you looking at me like that?" He whispered. "Cause you're happy. And I like seeing my people happy." I said with a soft voice, looking straight in his eyes as I smiled. "Your people?" "My people." I repeated, a chuckle leaving both of our lips before continuing the game.

I hope that someday that 'she' will be me.

//

A/n
This chapter, I dedicate up to my two dearest friends Sarah and Aditi. Thank you both for always being there for me. You make me happy. ❤️