Loving Brian | B.C

Part 79: open up

//tahnée//

The day was cold, hard wind and freezing temperatures. But the warmth of Brian's arms on the couch with How The Grinch Stole Christmas on the telly and hot chocolate broke the cold and made it all worthwhile.

I was resting between his legs. My back pressed up against his stomach and my head rested on his chest as his arms were tightly wrapped around me and our hands interlocked. "I could get use to this." He whispered in to my ear as he held me tighter. "Me too." I felt my cheeks burning, hotter than the hot chocolate and the butterflies went crazy. Crazier than ever.

-

After the movie ended we just sat on the couch talking. Never getting enough of one another's company, and that's a great characteristic for our relationship. "I want to show you something." He whispered to me as he drew small circles on my thigh. "But it's for your eyes only..." he looked in to my eyes with all sincerity. "What is it?"
"My heart." He spoked softer that soft. "I'm up for that." I smiked back to him.
Our eyes just locked on one another's, no movement, not even a word. In a swift, smooth grab he pulled me forward in to his embraced, holding me in his arms before pulling me on to him.
"What are you doing?"
"Just holding you."

-

Brian fell asleep on the couch, with me in his arms. His back facing the backrest of the couch and I'm just dangling on the side. But I don't care.
I just looked at him, cupped his cheek and caressed his skin.

I just can't help but smile when I look at him. I have this deep feeling in my heart, that warms me up everytime, because I know he's the one, the first one that I'll confess my love to. He has the patience for me to wait, he has the heart of gold that swallowed me in and now I'm locked away in the folds of his heart rooms.
I'm his. He just doesn't know that yet. He doesn't realize that yet.

I always wanted someone who won't care that I'm incapable of sitting still, that I can't grasp the concept of cleaning and refuse to be ladylike. Someone who realizes that half of the decisions I make are usually ones that I regret, and I have the right to overreact at any given moment. I want someone who knows how completely insane I am and what I went through to be where I am... and simply wouldn't want me any other way.
I found that in Brian. He found that in me, and simply didn't care. In fact I think it made him just like me more. It gave me the closure of him being the one and that I could stop my searching for someone who would accept that because it's him.

It's been him all along, I was just blind at first to see it. But now that I know— there's only two times that I want to be with him... that's now and forever. I slowly lifted up his arm, trying to get out of his grasp before standing up and walking over to the kitchen to get me some of mom's special noodles. She made it for lunch because tonight will be the big Christmas dinner with the Evans family as well.
Hectic.

Speaking of the Evans family... Micheal has been on my mind for the past few hours. He's acting really weirdly, especially around both me and Brian. Like Brian said. When he's with me, just me, it's all okay and we're the same crazy kids from kindergarten but the moment Brian's name leaves my lips or he joins in on the conversation it's like he loses it.
He doesn't like taking about Brian with me, to him or just even think about him. It makes me wonder, it makes me sad.
They kicked it off so good back in Canada and now they're separate... and I don't know why.

-

//micheal//

The time finally arrived for the great dinner party at Tahnée's house.
Not that I'm in the mood, but I don't want to make her upset.

My mom, dad and I walked across the street and knocked on the door before going in. Immediately I was greeted with a big hug from Tahnée and a handshake from Brian. The two of them— always together. I walked over to go greet her parents as my parents did the same, and in the background I could hear the two of them chuckling, smiling, laughing. When I turned around I saw his arms around her and she was so happy.
Why couldn't I give her that?