Saints Of The Mafia

🌹TWENTY🍃THREE

Tainted Hate
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Sychar

Jasha has not touched me since the ritual which occurred a month ago. He even allowed me to sleep on the sofa that is in the room. That night still traumatizes me, it didn't help that they kept me separate from my sisters. I didn't even get to see sweet little Auden.

My husband, for the most part, has kept me locked in the room we share. Maksim threatened Kisa and I's safety. So he is protecting me. Despite this and the fact that he has not harmed me, I keep waiting for him to lose patience and just rape me again.

During the night, I do not sleep, I just stare at his silhouette on the bed. A part of me knows he won't hurt me. Sometimes, most of the time, Jasha is this gentle-man that can't seem to hurt a fly.

But I'm not dumb I know he kills people. He probably murdered members of my family. Jasha is smart, he wouldn't have done it openly so that I would witness it.

I can't forgive what he has done. Yes, I fear him but there is a part of me that finds him handsome and dreamy. Sometimes I feel like I'm betraying my dead family and my sisters when my eyes linger on him longer than they should.

My feelings keep contradicting itself. One minute I hate him, the mere sight of him disgust me. Other times I love the way his curly hair falls around his face. And his abs after he seems to have come back from a workout is kiss-worthy. The way my name sings off his tongue in his thick accent.

When he sleeps he always faces in my direction. And Jasha stays that way until morning. My mind tries to rationalize to constantly hating him but my heart says otherwise.

My heart says to give him a chance. That he truly cares about me, however, my mind tells me that I'm playing myself. It tells me when I learn to trust him that he will forsake that trust. It may just end in my death.

The room tonight is darker than usual because of the snow storm. I hardly could see my wiggling toes in the thickness of darkness. Loud thunder burst through the sky with a roar that rocked even the sofa I was laying on.

An involuntary scream left me when another one tumbled out of the sky. I hated thunder. It was too loud. Rocking back and fouth, I covered my ears with my hands looking probably looking like a scared sixteen-year-old.

I jump out of my skin as a hand touches mine with a soft touch. I look to the side to see Jasha to the side of me with a slight smile on his face. He gently removes my hands from my ears. Then his hands come up to my face wiping it.

Was I crying?

"Thunder scares you?" he asks. I nod my head in answer to his question.

Another one hits and is way louder than the rest of them combined. I curl up into myself and pray that it passes soon.

"Do you wanna sleep with me? I promise to protect you..."

I watch him unsure of what to do. I bite the inside of my cheek and turn to see the heavy snow that falls outside. Slowly I look back to him and nod my head.

"Ok." I whispered. Jasha held my hand as we both walked back to the spacious bed. I get in first and he tucks me in kissing my forehead with a deep inhale. Then he leaves to his side of the bed.

I turn to my side facing away from him. My heart racing a mile a second. It is not out of fear but of excitement?

Thunder clapped out of the sky in ear curling booms that had me trembling under the sheets. I needed to feel safe and right now I still felt exposed to the thunder.

I turned to face Jasha and he was already sleeping still facing in my direction. Going over a little to his side I take in deep breaths to calm me. I could not believe I want him to comfort me. Worse yet I feel like the only way to accomplish that is by skin contact.

"Still can't sleep angel?" he asks his eyes still closed.

"No, I'm still afraid," he raises the comforter from his body and welcomes me in. Shifting backward I am engulfed by his body heat.

Jasha pulls the comforter back onto our joint bodies and his hand hugs me around the waist. In a snail-like way, I put my hand on his and bring it up to cup one of my breasts.

When I had a boyfriend he did this so I could fall asleep. I love it when a male does this. It does something to me. And because I have small boobs their big hand always swallowed them up.

Jasha pulls me even closer to him and I feel his lips on my neck his breath tickling the skin there. He softly kisses my neck and then he huskily whispers in my ear "I promise that I will never harm you Sychar. You are my life now. My heart, body, mind, and soul are yours. I will protect you with my life."

His promise makes tears come to my eyes and I hug his hand tighter to my chest. "I'm sorry for what happened at the ritual. Maksim was not going to let me back out of it. But I will spend the rest of my life making sure that you never cry because of me again." he finishes and I feel my eyes closing down.

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BANG!!!!
BANG!!!!
BANG!!!!

The door is being banged on and I quickly retract from the bed. Jasha looks confused at the door. A voice comes from the other side of the door and I'm relieved to know that it was not Maksim's.

"JASHA OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!!!!" the man yells and I look on in silence as Jasha springs up from off the bed quickly answering the door.

"Sachin?"

"Yeah, morning...Maksim has gone too fucking far. He almost killed Crimson, Sim beat her short her life then left her in the cold strung up like meat in the cold,"

I sit on the floor in shock. I knew Maksim was bad, he is a monster. I cried hard.

"I will speak to him,"

"Yeah fucking talk to him!" the man says then leaves from the door.

Jasha comes towards me and hugs on the floor. All I know is that I want to see my sister. "I want to see her," I say wiping my eyes.

"I will see if that could be arranged," He says drying my eyes and playing with my hair as I laid my head on his broad chest.

"Don't see, just arrange it you promised to keep me happy. And I promise, if you do this for me I will no longer fight you."

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