The Party, Pt. 14

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"Wha... What?" Jieun almost spluttered out all the water in her mouth over the table.

"Do you... like Taehyung?" Jungkook bit his lip nervously.

This had been the most direct Jungkook had ever been. If he could be this direct with her... why couldn't he just-

"Well, of course." Jieun laughed. "Don't we all?"

"I know, but-" Jungkook was obviously trying to get at something. "I don't, you know, talk about him the way you do."

"The way I do?" Jieun raised her eyebrows. "How do I talk about him?"

Jungkook shook his head, his grip on the glass tightening. "I don't know."

A few seconds passed in silence, but to Jieun, those few seconds felt like minutes in the empty, noiseless kitchen.

"But you know, sometimes when we're just hanging out and you suddenly start talking about him," Jungkook swallowed, looking away. "I don't like it."

Jieun frowned. There he was again, saying things like this. Jieun wasn't too sensitive to feel like they were hinting at something more... was she? She felt upset for some reason, he was simply causing her too much confusion, she wished she could just simply confront him about everything-

"Why do you always say such things?"

The words tumbled out of Jieun's mouth without her even realising it. Perhaps it was due to the many weeks of wondering how Jungkook felt, perhaps it was due to the very fact that she was sitting right opposite him in a room with no one else around, perhaps it could even be that one shot of alcohol she had drunk earlier out of sheer curiosity.

Her 3 months ago self would never have said such a thing. But perhaps, the influence of Yoojung for the past third of a year... was taking a toll on Jieun. She didn't know what compelled her to say it, but she did anyway. And as awkward as it felt saying it, she didn't regret it at all. It was something she had wanted to ask him someday, if not today. What she said obviously surprised Jungkook, since it surprised even Jieun herself.

"What?" Jungkook turned to look at her. "What things?"

She was already at it, why not just give it her best shot.

Jieun bit her lower lip. "Things that lead me on."

Jungkook's eyes widened.

"I mean," Jieun hesitated. "You always confuse me. Telling me things like you'd show your feelings more, hugging me, smiling at me with that sweet gaze of yours, telling me you wanna wear the couple bracelet because you won it with me- there were so many things you did and said... they're just not things you'd do to a friend."

"I..."

"But at the same time, I know you don't like me," Jieun hesitated. "You've said before that you'll tell the girl directly if you like her, but you've never once told me you liked me. And it really sucks, because on one hand you're doing things that lead me on and on the other hand you do things that show you don't actually like me, like not wearing that bracelet after saying you would..."

It really did suck. Jieun knew she was sounding petty and all, but that couple bracelet thing hurt her the most. The way he said he was gonna wear it every day but the very next day it had vanished from his wrist... it hurt her. The fact that she had to experience that after what he'd said had kept her up for an entire night... was more upsetting than she had imagined.

"Can't you just tell me your true feelings right now?"

Jieun was preparing for the worst, honestly, that he was just toying with her feelings or maybe was just being too kind or flirtatious towards her all this while. A huge part of her felt like that had to be the explanation to everything - would he make a promise to a girl he liked only to forget about it the next day... and even the day after? But she had to admit, that tiny little part of her was praying so hard that Jungkook would just say he liked her there and then, tell her everything was all a misunderstanding and that he really, really liked her.

But Jungkook reacted in an unexpected manner. He sat up straight all of a sudden, his eyebrows furrowed, his lips pursed and his arms crossed over his chest. He looked at the table, avoiding eye contact with her, seemingly not planning on answering her question. His response caught Jieun by surprise... and Jieun felt her heart sink at once, as the little part of her thought that perhaps, she had indeed gotten it all wrong this time.

"No...?" Jieun's eyes began to sting. She could feel tears welling up inside her eyes, threatening to fall. She forced a smile. "I mean... I was just asking, I was just curious, you don't need to-"

"I guess I've really misled you all this while, huh."

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