!DISCONTINUED! // he had the world // brallon oneshots

.lyn-z.

i remember when i first spoke to you.

you were ordering a cup of straight black coffee.

i remember why i spoke to you in the first place.

i was ordered to kill you.

i remember why i never went through with it.

we fell in love.

but then something happened. and you fell out of love with me.

i realized a while after we married that you no longer kissed me or touched me. i was worried that you were cheating. but then i remembered you aren't the kind of man to do that.

no, you just fell out of love with me. you no longer took interest in me, but started paying your attention to the heavily-tattooed, small, vulnerable and innocent-looking young man wandering about your office building.

i would have preferred that you were cheating.

seeing the way you looked at him with such awe and admiration and interest hurt.

when you admitted to me that you no longer loved me and preferred men over women, my heart felt like it was shattered to a million pieces.

beyond repair.

but i loved you and i wanted nothing more for you to be happy. you weren't happy with me.

weren't happy...

i remember the day we signed the divorce papers, my hands were shaking the entire time. you rubbed my back and held my hand, which made it ten times worse to sign it. i know it was a comfort thing more than anything else, which made it harder to go through with it for some reason.

when it was finally over, you walked me out to my car, a hand on my back the entire time. i remember what you told me.

"fall in love with somebody else, lindsey, and forget about me. don't keep yourself hung up on me, it won't do anything. i- i'll come by to take my stuff tomorrow afternoon."

you pressed a kiss to my cheek and squeezed my hand and walked away.

i cried for at least an hour before finally driving back home. the entire time i laid in bed, i imagined how you must be feeling and what you must be doing. you probably had a celebratory fuck with that man.

after you took your stuff back the next afternoon, i never saw you again.

until four years later when i saw you sitting at a table in the coffee shop we met in, the coffee shop you told me you loved me in, the coffee shop that you fucking proposed to me in.

you look different. you have vibrant red hair. it makes your beautiful eyes stand out.

i thought i was over you until i saw you again.

not a day goes by when i didn't think about you and wished you the best.

i would have walked over and said hi, but your boyfriend had come back from the restroom, so i left you alone.

or at least i was going to...

i found myself sitting a few tables away, but out of your sight until you both stood up from the table and linked arms, ready to walk out. when you did, i followed you very closely, until we got to where i assumed you both lived.

i waited until you entered your house and locked your door to jot down your address and walk back to my own place.

i dressed up in straight black and grabbed a few other things before going back to my car and driving to your house. luckily, the building closest to you was a tall apartment complex. when i got to the top of the building and got into position, i had looked through the scope in time to see you proposing to that man, who seemed more than eager to accept your proposal.

i couldn't do it.

i couldn't shoot you.

i cried that night.

i watched as you and him got into bed.

i watched as you and him kissed.

i watched as you and him had sex.

i couldn't take it anymore.

you ruined my life in both the best and worst ways possible.

i'm leaving. you've probably already forgotten about me, but i just wanted to say bye before i vanish. i hope you don't forget about me when you're happy and married with children and probably dozens of dogs.

gerard, do not break his heart. i don't know him and i don't know his name, but do this for me.

make yourself happy.

don't hurt him.

i love you.

until next time,

           ×olyn-z

♡

the sound of a gunshot startled frank awake.

♡

i honestly have no idea help

this made pretty much no sense, sorry.
it's just been in my drafts for way too long and i've already deleted a lot of stuff as it is, so i wanted to finish it. who knows, maybe it'll affect somebody, idk.