Loving him is so wrong!

Chapter fifteen

Alana
I know I shouldn't be pissed but it's been a whole month since Chandler has called or even check up on me and it's pissing me off. I have been calling and trying to see if he wanted to go on the hospital tour with me but no respond. I dialed his number one more time but straight to voicemail.
"Chandler Owen Carmichaels I have been calling and calling you and apparently you have fallen off the face of the earth. Anyways I was just calling to see if you wanted to tour the labor and delivery floor with me but I guess not. Bye!" I slammed my phone on the counter and got dressed to go to the mall.
I was just walking around spending Chandler's money when I felt someone grab my arm.
"Damn lil man got you waddling like crazy." Terrence said pulling me into a hug.
"Heeeeey you! How are you?" I said smiling up at him.
"I'm good. Where is your boyfriend?"
I gave him a "really" look and just laughed. "He's home with his wife ignoring me"
"If I was your man I wouldn't ever ignore you or have you on the side" he said pulling me closer to him.
I smiled and accepted his embrace. When I hugged him the smell of his cologne was intoxicating and it had me in a trance. I sniffed him and moaned a little bit. He must have heard me because he started laughing and then bent down and put his lips near my ears.
"I ain't even touched you and I got you ready to orgasm right here in the middle of this mall. But I will wait another three months to show you what I could do but I would like to take you out on a date.I mean you're already dress pretty so the date can start now." Terrence said as he grabbed my hand and walked me towards the exit.
"Where are you taking me?" I asked as he opened the door to his truck for me to get in.
"You want some lamb chops and mash potatoes?"
The sound of that made my stomach grumbled and I put my seat belt on.
"Cmon lets go!"
He drove for thirty minutes to these beautiful houses and I was so confused. I looked at him and he smiled at me.
"Don't be scared I'm going to cook for you at my house." Terrence said. He pulled up to a nice three story house and cut off his car.
He opened my door and walked me to the front door of his house. Once we got in his house I immediately started looking for signs of a woman. His house seemed to be woman free but that's just on the surface I'm not his rooms or anything.
"Gone get comfortable and I'm going to start cooking the food." He said getting all of the things out of his fridge.
I sat down on his couch and cut on the tv. I put on Love and hip hop. I got comfortable on his couch and waited for him to come sit in here.
"So Terence why are you single?" I yelled from my spot on the couch.
"Damn we getting right into it." He laughed handling me a bottle of water.
"Yeah we are!"
"Well to answer your question me and my ex wife split because we got married young so I fell out of love for her. She didn't make me happy anymore and I didn't make her happy so we both decided to get a divorce." He said truthfully. "Also the sex was boring and I'm a very kinky man"
"I can tell. You got a pregnant woman fetish" i said making him laugh again.
"Nah baby i just like your vibe and also you too sexy to be on the side lines. So tell me how did you become his side chick?"
"Well one night me and my friend were out drinking and partying we came back to her house and her dad was my god father but i had a crush on him and i had sex with him. After that he was hooked and here we are two years later"
"Damn do you must got that good good to make him wanna leave his wife for you"
"He's not ever going to leave her and I'm too stupid to believe that he ever will." I said now thinking about Chandler bitch ass.
We sat there talking for another hour before he went to check on the food. I walked in the kitchen behind him and just admire him from a far cooking in the kitchen. Chandler barely knew how to cook eggs so seeing a man cook was a new level of turn on. Once he realized that I was looking at him he walked towards me and picked me up.
"Oh you picking me up like I don't weigh 200 pounds right now" i laughed
"Girl shut up you don't weigh that much" he said kissing my neck.
I leaned my head back so he could get more access to my neck. He started sucking on my neck and I lost it I was moaning before I even knew I was. He stopped and then his kisses trailed down to my boobs. I grabbed his head and he started sucking on them then he pulled away from me.
"Mmmmm no no ima stop. After you have your baby then ima fuck the shit out of you!" He said
He helped me down off his island and we made our plates and ate sexually frustrated as hell. After we ate we decided to watch a movie in his bed.  I went upstairs to his room and got in his bed and waited on him to come out the bathroom.
"Let's watch the conjuring" i said as I got comfortable in his bed.
"No i hate scary movies.You staying the night with me?"
"Yeah give me something to wear and I'm all yours"
He went to his drawer and grabbed me a tshirt and some sweatpants.
"Gone get up so we can take a bath together. We can do that and I'll please you then." He said pulling me out of his bed
"Ugggggh I just got comfortable" I groaned.
We went into his bathroom and I saw a bubble bath ready for us to get it.
"So. We are moving a bit fast but I like you and I'll patiently wait on you but what I won't do is be in some love triangle with you and your baby daddy. Okay" Terrence said looking at me and pulling my clothes off at the same time.
"I told you my relationship is complicated with him. But I promise" i said
I got into the tub and my body started to instantly relax. I watched as Terrence took his clothes off and oweee he is definitely big. I sat up for him and he got on behind me. I laid my head on his chest and relaxed. Terrence grabbed the towel and started to wash my body. Feeling him touch me had my body on fire I wanted to feel him all inside me but I can't yet. He slowly massage my boobs with the towel then slowly pinched my nipples. I moaned as I place my head in the crook of his neck. He then slowly moved his hand down to my pussy. He rotated his hand in slow circular motion then he'll stop then he'll do it again. He moved his free hand to my boobs and started massaging my nipples in the same rhythm he was with my clit. I moaned loudly and moved my hips to tell him not to stop. He laughed and sucked on my earlobes making me go even crazier and before I knew it I was cumming.
"Oooh fuck you're making this harder and harder for me to behave" i said sitting up and turning towards him.
"I know which is why I think it's so funny and I like teasing you."
"Well stop it, it's not fair"
I folded my arms and fake pouted. He pulled me close to him and kissed me one more time before we got out the tub. Once we got in the bed we cuddled each other and finally decided on a movie.
"Well since we finna watch this movie don't be looking at me crazy when i start screaming I told you I don't like scary movies" Terrence said pulling me closer to his body.
"Whatever don't be such a pussy."
I don't know when we fell asleep but it was 3:45 in the morning when my phone kept on ringing. I rolled over and saw that Chandler had called me four times. I grabbed my phone and called him back.
"Yes!" I said into the phone
"Where are you?" Chandler yelled into the phone.
"I'm at home."
"No the fuck you're not I'm here and I don't see you. So where yo lying ass at?"
I looked and saw that Terrence was now awake and was just looking at me. I couldn't read his expression but he just waited for me to also answer. I closed my eyes and answered.
"I'm with Terrence." I said cringing.
"Hmm oh. So you are fucking him! Bring your ass home now!" Chandler said.
"I'm not fucking him Chandler I'm pregnant!"
I looked at Terence again feeling myself about to cry because I didn't know what to do. If I hung up the phone it would have been worse and if I left I would have lost Terrence and I really like him. I'm stuck.
"Hello! Alana you wanted me here and you out fucking."
"Chandler I'm on my way but my car is at the mall."
I looked at Terrence and he just shook his head and got dressed. I felt like shit I really want to be with him but I have to get over one man before getting under another one. We drove back to the mall in silence and when we got there I just looked at Terrence. He's an amazing guy and here I am running back to a married man. Before I got out the car I grabbed Terrence face and kissed him.
"Look I don't want you to not have you in my life. I'm only leaving tonight to not cause any drama but I do want you. I promise that I won't have you in some stupid love triangle but right now I need to handle what I got going on at home before I put myself in another relationship. I wanna be all yours you get what I'm saying?" I said
"Like I said I got three months before we have sex so you got three months to figure out if you want to be put first or always be put second. I'm not a fan of waiting but I'll wait cause I like you."
Terrence kissed me one last time before I got out his car. He watched me get into my car and safely pulled out the mall parking lot. It took me fifteen minutes to get home and I gather my thoughts for the fight that's about to happen. When I walked to the door Chandler pulled the door opened and dragged me into the house.
"You out here fucking random men while pregnant with my baby!" He said pushing me on the couch.
"NO IM NOT! We didn't even do anything"
"Bitch you don't think I know you! You definitely done something with him. How you gonna blow up my phone telling me I'm not shit when you out here doing how shit!"
"I didn't fuck him Chandler I'm fucking pregnant!! But that doesn't matter at all you got a wife and I'm here stuck waiting on you and I'm sick of it. I'm tired of being your second choice and I'm tired of giving my hopes up about you divorcing her because I know you're not going to do it. You just like saying that because you know how much I love you. I'm sick of this shit! Does she even know that you're here? What excuse did you use now? I'm over this situation I'm over being your side chick. We are finished !" I said
He looked at me and I could tell he was so pissed. He was all red in the face and I can tell he's been drinking. I got off the couch and walked towards him. I love Chandler more than anything but I can't continue to be the girl on the side. Terrence was right I need to be with a man that loves me and only me and Chandler wasn't ever going to do it. I hate to admit it but everyone was right I'm dumb for even fucking him. I walked away from Chandler and went into my room. I'm too tired to fight with him and quite frankly I'm over the thought of  being with him. Chandler walked into the room and got into the bed and pulled me closer to him. Chandler nuzzled his nose into my neck and then pulled back.
"You smell like him. Let's shower"
I'm so sick of bathing today but I got up and went to the shower with Chandler. He picked me up and kissed me.
"I don't expect you to wait on me but I am in love with you Alana. You knew what we had is complicated and you know I can't leave her just yet. I'm not telling you to wait but I don't want you to move on either. I meant it when I told you that you were mine!"
Chandler slowly entered me and slowly moved his hips in a fast pace then he stopped. He inserted me again and got deeper than pulled out. I was already sexually frustrated and he wasn't making it no better. He put his hand around my neck and deepened our kissed. He pulled back off me and then looked me in the eyes.
"Why are you stopping?" I asked just above a whisper.
"Tell me you're mine and I'll fuck you. I can tell you're close!"
"I can't do that. I'm not yours to keep on the side" i said trying to push him into me.
He grabbed my hips to stop me from moving my hips and tighten the grip around my neck. I felt like he was lowkey trying to kill me. I put my hand over his and tapped his hand.
"Tell me!"
"I'm yours!" I finally said and he pushed all the way inside me and started showing me no mercy.
I yelled and moaned from the pain and tried my best to keep up. I felt like he was taking his anger out on me and I was right because he tighten his grip on my neck again.
"You will always be mine he can't have you YOU ARE MINE FOREVER" he said
I wasn't even listening to anything he was saying but I was right there ready to cum so I agreed.
"Yes yes baby yes" i screamed as I cummed and almost fell in the shower.
After that I quickly washed my body and got in the bed ready to go to sleep but I couldn't. I tossed and turned in the bed for two hours and finally just sat up. Something was on my mind and I had to get it out. I hit Chandler waking him up from his sleep, he sat up and looked at me like I was crazy.
"Chandler I cant do this anymore. I'm so serious when I said that we are over. You are obviously not leaving her and I'm not waiting around for you. I like Terrence and he likes me too. I'm sorry but this will seriously be the last time we fuck or anything. I'm in love with you but you just constantly play on my emotions and I'm not with it. I'm done I'm out!"
Chandler laid back down and then rolled over.
"Hello I know you heard me!"
"Yeah I heard you but you say this how many times. He won't last but I'm here always. I'm in love with you"
"Okay you always say that. What does being in love with me have to do with the fact that you will pick her before me?"
"How do I pick her before you?"
"How do you not! Either way this is over after this trip you will not spontaneously pop up over here anymore. I will call you when I'm close to having him. We are over!"
I cut the light off and went to sleep happy but sad with my decision. It's going to hurt but I deserve to have a man all to myself. Chandler is just going to have to deal with it we are going to be coparenting and that's it.
"Also chandler put my bills back in my name!"
"No. I got you on that forever whether you like it or not. I might not can have you but I'll always make sure you and my son are straight" Chandler said
He pulled me close to him and held me like his life depended on it and I held on to him. I'm going to miss him and I know I did this before but I'm sticking to it this time.
"I love you Alana and I'll always love you."
"I love you too baby"
But I have to move on.