Hunger - (Vampire Deku, Bakudeku) DISCONTINUED

Chapter 62- Equals (Part 1)

Deku's POV
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I wake up before Kacchan does. I honestly didn't sleep very well, and I was up a few hours ago. I've just been pacing around trying to figure out why I feel so wrong inside. And I finally figured it out. I feel really guilty. Kacchan was so sweet last night. Almost ridiculously sweet. He really loves me. I obviously knew what the words meant, but just hearing the words is a lot different then showing someone what they mean. And I know for Kacchan actions speak louder than words. And I just couldn't stop thinking,

What have I ever done for him?

And I couldn't think of even one thing. I'm so selfish. This is exactly what I was worried about. Kacchan is already putting more into the... relationship. If you can even call it that. We haven't gone on a date, or done any really couple-y things. In fact, not much has changed at all. I know we were pretty physical before, but since we started dating, we've touched each other even less.

Am I doing something wrong? I mean, I don't think I officially said we were dating but still... Maybe he doesn't want to -No. That isn't it. There is no way. So then what IS it? He did say, "You're not ready for that," so that might be why. But what does he mean? Not ready for what? Maybe he just thinks we aren't in a strong enough relationship for whatever "that" is.

I plop myself down in Kacchan's desk chair, spinning myself in circles slowly.

It's not like I'm desperate or anything... but I'm not stupid either. I was sure he would want to do... something more drastic, seeing as I gave him permission to do whatever he wanted. But he was just really sweet. He does seem to like it when I initiate things. Maybe I should give that a try. I think I would probably mess it up, or make things weird. I am defiantly not sexy in the slightest.

Though, I did manage to seduce him that one time, with the help of Kirishima. Ehh... but now that I think about it, I don't think I would survive that again, and Kirishima definitely would not. So... I will have to figure something else out.

My best guess is that Kacchan is trying to be respectful or something. I don't know why. It's bothering me. In this relationship, we should be equals.

I want to do something for him. He does so much for me. I just need to figure out what.

What would break him?

"Deku?" Kacchan groans as he rolls over to face me. "Why the fuck are you mumbling in the dark?"

"O-oh sorry Kacchan. I'm just... um worried about training today." I lie a little.

"Well worry quieter. Fucking loud as hell..." He pulls the blanket over his head. I stifle a giggle, and stand up from my chair. I might as well get ready now.

We are back to intense training today, so I get to wear my normal clothes. I start rummaging through my wide selection of pants. Any one of these will work fine. They were nice to work out in before, so I'm not worried. But then, a thought occurred to me... If I'm trying to seduce Kacchan without getting me or anyone else killed, then wouldn't shorts be better? I know he enjoys them, but I don't know how comfortable I would feel wearing those outside. If I don't think about it, it shouldn't be too embarrassing. It's just shorts anyways. No big deal at all.

I slide on a particularly form fitting pair of black shorts. They barely go down past my butt though... I don't remember them being this short. Oh well. If this is what it takes for us to be equals, it is a small price to pay.

Besides that, I find a tight black tank top, and pull on a loose windbreaker. The white, shinny polyester was a nice contrast to my otherwise all black outfit. I fiddle with the drawstrings and zipper, walking into the bathroom. I make sure to close the door before I turn on the light so I don't wake Kacchan up. I zip it up about halfway, and stick my hands in my pockets, trying to see if I have any semblance of style in the mirror. I decide its not the worst thing I've ever seen, and move on to my hair. I tame it to the best of my abilities, and brush my teeth. I wash my face and smile a few times trying to find the right one to use.