Elliot and Julia have a complicated relationship. Since they met in the seventh grade, the only heart-to-heart conversations they've had have been strictly over text. But they don't mind this lack of intimacy. If anything, they enjoy it.
Don't thi...
Okay let's take a break from Eli and I talking about how our relationship progressed over time. Because really, since you weren't there and he and I are absolutely horrible storytellers, you probably are missing the small but important changes in our relationship. So I'm not going to talk about that right now. Let's talk about Eli's inability to speak clearly.
The kid cannot physically speak up. He just mutters to himself or stutters through his words and with his deep voice, it just sounds like a low rumbling noise. I have never met another flirt that is less well spoken than he is. I'm not really sure how he flirts at all.
Keep in mind, I don't just mean public speaking. I'm saying all the time. But don't even get me started on public speaking. When that kid volunteers to read aloud in class I want to shoot myself.
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"Elliot."
"Julia."
"Nice to see you."
"Is it?"
"I'm trying to be polite."
"Oh. Sorry."
"I guess we can't even have a decent conversation?"
"Sorry for being such a disappointment."
"You're not a disappointment."
"Maybe you can convince my father that that's true."
