Sunflower Reviews

Kinal - When Worlds Crossed

Reviewer: kinalhariya

Review: When Worlds Crossed

Client: conquestofthesomnium

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Title and cover:

Interesting title. The first thing I would think after reading the title would be that two people from status/lifestyle met. Or literally two different worlds if this is a fantasy novel. I am excited to see what this book is about, just by seeing its title.

I loved the concept of cover. The use of black and white clearly depicts the people from two worlds. Using white letters in the black area and vice versa was a great idea too. I just felt that a better font could be used. Still, a great cover.

Blurb

Starting sentence was wow. That one line was enough to set the mood. Very interesting blurb. It made me excited to dive into the story. Just as the start, ending paragraph was hooking too.

Look out for fluctuating tenses in the blurb.

The para- 'Life is a big bubble....enemies hunting him'. I would suggest looking over the paragraph and to see if this could be improvised more. It is correct but doesn't have the catch that other paragraphs carry. Just see if you can tweak it a little.

Overall, the blurb was well written. It is definitely enough to catch the eye of the readers.

Prologue

What a fantastic start. It made me curious who the cloaked man was and why he was after the prince. But also gave a hint about how the prince may have reached the other world.

The way that man teased the prince; the taunting and all, literally gave me goosebumps as I visualized the scene.

The quote/sentence used at the very top was a nice idea and it was well incorporated inside the chapter too.

A very well written prologue, with absolutely no grammatical errors.

Moving forward to the chapters,

Characterization is set within the first chapter itself. So many things about and related to the main lead has been shown, without making it complicated. The scenes, expressions, dialogues, everything is written with great expertise. It is easy to picturize what is going on.

Descriptions are good too. They aren't too much to get bored nor are they too little. Just the perfect balance.

I like how every chapter starts with a quote that relates to that chapter.

The story flows as smooth as butter. There wasn't a single moment of dullness.

Although this isn't my first time reading a time travel story, this one is still unique in it's own way. It is usually the characters traveling to the past/other world. But here it is the opposite; a character from other world has come here.

The subtle differences and similarities between the worlds are shown nicely. However, you can still show more of them to create a better world building.

Your writing style is awesome.

The information about the other world, the main lead's relation with her family and friends; everything is shown through actions rather than dumping it upon readers. I love that about your book.

It makes it easier to distinguish, remember and understand the plot rather than getting tangled in heaps of information.

The concept is awesome and it is written fantastically as well.

Grammatical errors:

Look out for fluctuating tenses, this one error was repeated all over the book.

She once got lost while shopping before and It wasn't....(as it is not a new sentence i in 'It' shouldn't be capitalized) chapter three.

Missing full stop in one place (chapter five)

Chapter Seven

I should bhave been more considerate (typo).

The principal was worried....(typo in the sentence).

"here, Adie. Try this"- first letter should be capitalized.

Spelling mistake- relate

Chapter Nine

"it's okay". I should be capital here.

Missing full stop in the next sentence.

Missing quotation mark in last sentence.

Over all,

An intriguing, interesting and well written book. Apart from minor errors, the book was written fantastically. There isn't much to improve as the book is already the best.

One of the best books I have read. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and will surely read further, when the chapters get updated.

Thanks for choosing me. Keep writing!!

[Number of chapters reviewed: every chapter that was available (prologue+9)]