Sunflower Reviews

Orlaith - The Legend of Medoria

Reviewer: Orlaith (Myst3ry007)

Review: The Legend of Medoria

Client: Rudolfa_WolfPack

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The legend of Medoria is an interesting concept that caught my eye the moment I set eyesupon it. Its very name caught my attention which was solidified by the blurb attached.

Blurb:

Every sentence of the blurb caused you to intake a breath and question what would happenwithin the book. However, the blurb lacked in the sense that it just felt like something wasmissing. It was straight to the point which I liked, but it didn't pack the punch I was looking for.

Grammar & Punctuation:

With regards to grammar and punctuation, I was happy to say there wasn't anything major.In certain places there are points where some words are used incorrectly.

Thrashing is one word that I found odd. Usually used when talking about shaking to get someone off you, or in the instance of fighting back. Here, it was used as a word to describesomeone attacking someone else with a sword. This came across as strange in the sensethat it was meant to be a fast blow yet was described as a thrashing one which in turn mademe picture someone convulsing on the ground which is the opposite of what the author wasgoing for.

Paragraphing & Phrasing

The moment I dived into The Legend; I felt my heart sink. The paragraphs appeared far toolong and just set me in the mood that, 'oh boy' this is going to be rough. And it was for thefirst chapter. I understand that you need to pepper in world building and understanding, butthe paragraphs could be shortened.

There were instances where sentences needn't be so long. As the author added extra wordsthat felt redundant or useless. I felt cheated in the first few chapters as well because it feltlike the story wasn't progressing. It lacked in the sense that the information given wasn'tsufficient and felt more like a filler chapter than one of importance.

Something to note is that when writing speech, each sentence needs to start on a new lineunless spoken from the same person. Speech shouldn't be peppered into long paragraphsas it takes away from whoever is speaking. Or it gets lost in the paragraph and the readerdoesn't register that anyone actually even spoke.

Characterization:

The characters within this book are amazing in the sense that I can picture each one havingtheir own voice. The issue I do have with this though is that there is a major lack ofdescription to do with characters.

Only three major characters were given description yet the bullies were left out. Yet itseemed like they played a huge role in the start as they teased the MC to her wits end aswell as she saved them. And one even seemed to have affections for her.

The place where I feel some characters do lack though is when it comes to speech. Even formedieval times, some of the speech between characters felt rather off. It came across asunnatural and without a flow.

Plot:

There is also a moment where it is said and I quote, "The boys dropped into a sprint, whileRudolfa jogged." This would imply that Rudolfa is faster than the boys, yet she comes in lastduring this run. This further makes no sense as she is then told later that this is the 3 rd time,she has come last meaning she has done so before. So how is it that she is faster in oneinstant and then suddenly not in the next.

The plot was intriguing and really got a hold of me once I reached about chapter five. I foundthe villain quite intriguing too, his hidden figure in the beginning really stirred the pot ofinterest however I felt like it lost its intrigue since his name was revealed far too quickly in myopinion.

There was an ebb and flow to the plot however but I do feel the start of the story can beimproved. With regards to description though, there are moments when things are far toolong or just overused. There are times when 'was' is used way too often and which can belessened to make the flow of the story much better. Every sentence needn't use the word.You can just use the past tense verb. (The smell of a fresh apple pie wafted to her from anopen window.)

I also feel like there should be significant points made of time jumps especially consideringthe MC. Since the age of the character is glanced over in the beginning, you don't want thereader going back to that to figure out how long has passed. So I would instead add timeseither above in bold or make some reference to their age again.

Writing Style:

The writing style overall was great. The author chose third person past and it read with agood pace. Parts were slow and some were fast but in a way that left you interested andwanting more. I feel like this is where the author excelled.

The issue I do have with their writing style is the lack of research however. Research is partof every author's domain; they need to research what they don't understand or haven't done.With this regard I feel like the author should deep dive into medieval fighting. Be it with asword, shield, spear, axe.

There were scenes where sword fighting occurred and where the author wrote the word cut. He cut my side. Yet in the next sentence it is said that the character parried meaningblocked. This doesn't add up in the sense that when someone reads cut, they think bloodwas draw.

Instead, it should have been, 'she thrusted towards his side which he parried'. 'She threw anoverhand blow which he parried again.' This shows that they are fighting but each blowdoesn't land, instead it is stopped. Whereas using the word cut comes across as if thecharacter had made contact and wounded the other.

Overall:

Overall, I would definitely recommend this book to people who love a good fantasy. It hasgood qualities to it, good characters and a well written and thought-out plot. There are a fewissues here and there but with some work and a look into it from an editor this book could begreat.