30 Year Old Lady Daily Life

Part 54

Hmm. I sat down at the edge of my bed after finishing take a bath and wash my hair. Futaba's words come to my minds.

'But he doesn't want to bet. Men who can't bet on the girl, means he is not serious about her'

"Enjoy it, huh?"I murmured alone. No one in my room now. Maybe Fei and Misaki meet with their boyfriend. Siri maybe has some business with our scout's thing, counting as tournament is near and she is treasurer there.

I let out a sigh. To be honest, I agree with Hirata. Play along with him, but in the end my mind isn't settled yet with that system. I am still hurt when he chooses another girl than me.

"What are you doing? Stare blankly at the wall?"I see Misaki come to our room. She opened her clothes, as ready to go at the bathroom.

"Nothing"Uh, like I said. It's hard to get 'alone time' at this boarding room. I move my hands, dry my hair with a towel.

"How is it?"She looks at me, excited. Her body already wrapped on a towel.

"Go take a bath"She signed 'okay' at me and disappeared from the room. Our bathroom located at the outside of our room. It's take maybe 10 minutes for Misaki to finish her bathe. I slide my phone, check out my message. Many of them from Suguru. Some from Futaba. I sighed. No message from Hirata. I ask my self, what actually I expecting from this vague play?

"So, what is it?"I put my phone after locking it at my bed.

"How about your relationship with your boyfriend?"Misaki grinds her teeth and glares at me. She got me, I want to misdirecting our conversation.

"Okay. What do you want to know?"I sighed. Give up. In the end, there is not nice things to say.

"There is progress?"Her eyes dilated, I can see she is thrilled.

"No. It's not like we agreed to be in a relationship or something that binding us"Misaki sighed, disappointed. I pay attention to her expression. Contrast with me, I am just feels normal. Maybe I am already enough by holding my crying at that time in the library.

"But he seems take a peek at you many times, you know"Hmm, I know. Misaki already said it. I let out a sigh. There are not excited feelings when I hear it again.

"Ah, so like that"I look away and dry my hair again while moving my towel on my head.

"Why do you think Hirata acts like that? Like regret something? Like wants to talk with you. Or seems jealous when you with someone?"He said that, he felt weird when I was with another man. But why after hearing Futaba's word, I feel it has less effect on me?

"I don't know"I looked down. Don't want to interpret it. Maybe I'm tired of playing. I mean, if at least he stays at that time, I still can thought of another possibility. But he leaves me when Sakura asks him to come. Not even seems explain anything at phone. He said he feels weird always giving Sakura his time. But see how fast he comes when that girl calls him! It's too contradictory! Makes me really can't think another thing than it's just a lie. Words he told to me.

"Sakura seems not even willing to fix her relationship"Ah, I glance for a moment at Misaki, interested. A little bit. But then, I look away again while sighing.

"It's that so? Maybe they'll be an item sooner"

"Maika!"Misaki's high tone makes me don't have a choice than to focus on her. She seems worried with me. Well, I understand I'm not as optimistic like usual. But what to do with this unbalanced condition?

"You need to have a strong grip. Chase him again, will ya?"I look away, I think what's the hell words this girl will say to me!

"I don't have the courage to put everything to catch him"

"But you like him so much, isn't it?"I feel like Misaki slap me with this word. I don't know this word is a curse or not for me.

"Did I?"I can see her eyes widened, can't believe my words. Yeah, even I can't believe I would say this too. But somehow, nowadays I feel like I can control my self more. And lots of advice -. I stopped. I mean, let's call it advice, from Futaba. And Suguru's present too, who is always beside me, although I hurt him. Somehow, I don't have too much courage to stand on my feelings anymore.

"We need to fight for our love, Maika"I stared at her.

"Did you act like that with your boyfriend?"

"I like him at least"Misaki shows certainty. Ah, I see.

"Not based on the time you spent with him?"She shakes her head. I think I got the right point. Seems not. So, time doesn't always work. I looked down, somehow Suguru popped out at my mind.

"The problem is Hirata always comes to Sakura, whatever the circumstances, Misaki. If you face condition like that, what would you do?"Silence comes between us. Misaki seems troubled to answer it.

"Ma - maybe you can try to show him. About how you care with him?"Does that will work?

"Let's see. If you like someone, but in the first place you are not his first choice. You still want to fight for his attention? To prove you're better than the girls he already loves?"

"U - uh. If Hirata loves Sakura, didn't think about you, he wouldn't take a peek at you. There are his feelings for you! I - I believe"Misaki stuttered while answering me. She got the point. But considering different than wavering. Maybe his feelings for me just until the 'wavering' step, no more than that. I keep defending my self, not to moved by Misaki's tempting words.

"So, you would give up?"Doesn't that sound good? It's better for everyone. I muttered that, but there are gloomy feelings come after it.

"That's sounds good. It's not troubled everyone"I don't seem to agree with my words too. But what should I do?

"You don't seem happy"I sighed by Misaki's words. Right, I'm not. But what choices do I have?

"Let's see. Maybe I will have the opportunity later"I said that with unsure feelings too. Why does like I am the one who feels pitiful here?

"Maika, it's not like I told you to see Hirata only. Like I said at our other talk. Suguru is attached to you too. Don't you want to consider him?"I glance at her. Hmm, I know it's not a bad idea. But whenever I am with him, I don't feel thrilled. Even last time at library too, it's just a calm feeling. Does that count as a shape of like too?

"You're right. Maybe I need to look around. There are many good men than Hirata"I seem in deep thought when considering this option. A try maybe it won't harm me too.

"Ah, I forgot. This weekend, maybe Hirata, Sakura and some of other person will go at the beach"My eyes widened. Hirata didn't tell me. Suddenly, that fact hit me hard.

"Hirata doesn't tell you?"I give a faint smile for Misaki's words.

"No. Isn't that funny?"I laugh with suffering feeling inside at the end. Misaki can just put a pitiful face for me.