My Letters to God.

Letter 30

We are some twisted creatures Lord. 
I don't want to sound negative or ungrateful; not at all because you made us and give us the choice to be good and do good but many times we do bad...It's like we're imploding on ourselves God. There's so much pain and hatred in this world...we're dying off like flies towards a burning lamp and the worst part is none of us seems to care. Each day we get so consumed in our lives that we push you aside and our own brothers and sisters around the world. I am not without fault either Lord. So many times I think that maybe if I ignore hard enough everything will be like a bad dream I can wake up from. That the world will still spin, still tilt on its axis and we'll all still be here. But that's wrong. That is so, so wrong Lord. Today in my night devotional book I read about compassion and caring and how the generation today lack that because we see violence every day. We see it on the news, the streets, just outside my window I hear it. The sirens crying out into the night and people laughing or yelling and I and so many others are just so use to it that we shrug and continue on with our lives. As children to adults we went from so much empathy to almost complete apathy. A kid died at my old high school Lord and I do not know him but I prayed his family was comforted and that he's resting up there with you...I have no idea what to say to my friend bubbles Lord. She says she can't cry. That she feels like its a dream because yesterday she was talking to the guy and now...I don't know how to cheer her up or help her Lord. I don't know if she's apathy because that's not like her now that I think about it. She may be numb and doubting his death but I don't know what to say. Sometimes Lord I wish I wasn't so weak and can help those I see. I feel like a failure every time I can't help someone or speak to them about you. I feel like I'm a failure as your child and as a human being...so small and trapped in my twisted mind that I don't know how to open my mouth and speak. I don't want to end up like that Lord. Apathetic to those around me suffering again. I don't want a hard heart...not again. Dear God. Please comfort that guy's family and his little daughter that was left behind in the tragedy. I pray he is resting peacefully up there with you Lord. Also that Bubbles will grieve so nothing with build up in her and make her explode. I pray for those I can not help and do not know that suffers each and every day. I pray that you comfort them and hold them close to your heart and that we have compassion for them. Help me not go back to that empty cold person I once was and is still trying to get away from. Help me know what to say when others are down and need encouraging. I pray you speak through me Lord to build others up as well as myself when we feel the depressing grips of life trying to drag us to the ground. Thank you Lord for every day we are alive and breathing. Thank you Jesus for being born and saving us from Hell. In Jesus name: Amen.

Candy.