Ones Love Can Be So Strong Between Two People (A Rammstein Love Story)

Chapter 36- Accepting Help/Processing&Healing

(Maisie's POV)

Its now around 10am and Reesh and I have only just arrived home and honestly I thank my insomnia for once because I don't think I would have ever remember that tour if Richard hadn't of told me.

The realisation that I had actually forgotten about it is beyond me but Richard remembering really has unlocked hidden memories and I'm able to enjoy them and be excited but now I'm also realising that I'm not as such as a stranger after all.

Rammstein do know me; they probably just haven't recognised me like Richard has but it still sickens me slightly that I broke Richard's heart and I didn't even know it.

Sure I was young at the time and I knew I couldn't stay on tour with them; my Dad stated very clearly that this was a one time thing and that I wouldn't be able to tour for years.

Richard parked the car into the driveway and I was happy to be home because I was sleepy since I haven't slept.

"Thank you Richard" I smiled as we both got out of the car "you're very welcome Mais; I can't believe you didn't recognise me" Richard smiled as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder "I'm sorry I didn't recognise you but I now thank you for unlocking hidden memories" I smiled and hugged him tight within my arms "you are a dope baby but now I want us to go on adventures...as long as its ok with your Dad" he smiled as we pulled away "I'll have to ask him but I would love to" I smiled Richard smiled and pressed his lips to my forehead before we walked into the house to see the entire household of Rammstein in an absolute panic especially Till.

"Hi guys" Richard smiled "oh baby wo bist du" Till ran up to me and held me close to his arms as if he never wanted to let me go.

"Baby what's wrong" I asked as I pulled away slightly "what's wrong; we've all been worried about you guys" Till sighed and locked me tight within his arms once again "but we only went out for coffee; we couldn't sleep" Richard explained.

"Maisie we were worried out of our fucking minds about" Paul sighed "wait why are you all worried; I'm not a kid" I defended "Maisie it isn't about that..." Schneider admitted "its about the ra..." Paul tried to explain but he couldn't face it.

"I know what happened and I don't need to be reminded; I'm still healing yes but I cannot let it prevent me from living my normal life otherwise I'll never heal" I sighed and unbuckled myself from Till "the last thing I want is to be treated like kid; I know you all care but I still need time to heal and face the outside world" I sighed and ran upstairs slamming my bedroom door.

I know they mean well but I can't be treated like a kid; it will just make me worse and then I will never be able to heal; I just can't believe how worried they all are.

Sure we went out in the middle of the night but they must of known Reesh had disappeared and linked me up with him; oh maybe I need to talk someone since I haven't properly opened up about it since it occurred.

But do they honestly expect me to go out with at least 2 of them to prevent it from happening because if that's what they think then I can't allow that; I have to face my fears but also have time to properly heal and actually take in what happened that day.

I started to strip my clothes and went into my closet and pulled out some sweats and a Rammstein hoodie.

I know they meant well but seriously treating me like a kid will only make me worse mentally and emotionally; I've only ever relied on my Dad over the years but even then I've always been an independent person and I don't want it to stop now, never.

I crawled upon the bed and wrapped myself in all the duvets and pillows that Till and I had upon our bed and allowed my heart to cry.

I know I shouldn't have been so harsh on them and honestly I didn't mean it; it was just a shock that they actually still take into consideration that it happened and maybe I'm actually forgetting about it without realising.