Coffee

Part 102: Don't Ask Again

My head hurts terribly.

My eyes are red and puffy.

My nose will never be unstuffed.

And my heart will never be mended again.

My whole body aches from sleeping on the floor with Sophie. She's curled up next to my and wouldn't leave my side at all. This morning, as I awake to pounding on my front door- I'm immediately angered. Getting up, I storm to the front door, unlock it and throw it open, ready to yell at whoever's on the other side.

Most likely being Max.

"WHAT!" I throw open the door and find Iggy and his family on the other side of it. My body stills and I feel sick. "I'm so sorry. I thought you were the person who was pounding on my door incessantly last night."

I step aside and let them in.

"Who was that?" Martin asks and I shake my head.

"Lord only knows- I didn't open the door to find out." I try to sound a little cheery, but Lord knows I fail at it. They stand in my foyer and all five of them just look at me sadly. "Would you like to come in and sit down? I can make breakfast or sweets."

"We just wanted to stop by and see how you were doing." Iggy smiles softly and has his hand on Samara's shoulder. She looks a wreck and who could blame her. How traumatic that probably was she's only 10. Kneeling down in front of her, I brush some hair out of her face and caress her cheek.

"How are you sweetie?" She starts crying and I pull her close to me. She sits on my folded legs and holds onto me tightly. "Shhh....it's alright. It's alright."

"I'm so sorry, Dr. Sharpe...." Her tears stain my neck and I just leave little kisses on her temple.

"No, none of that. Hey...look at me, sweetheart." She pulls back and I cup the sides of her face in my hands. "I know it was probably very scary for you. I know how upset you are, how sorry you are, but Samara, it'll get better and easier. I promise. Okay? He did his job. He kept someone he cared about safe. Which means, he loves you dearly."

I start to stand up and I lead her by her hand into my kitchen. Going into the bag from the vet, I take out the envelope, grab a small sandwich snack bag and I look at her softly.

"He may not be with us in the flesh, but, we can always carry apart of him in our heart." I open the envelope and take a small tuff of hair out and place it in the bag before sealing it up. I walk over and grab a black sharpie marker and I write:

Bentley James
2017-2019
The goodest of the good boys.

I put a little paw print next to his name and I hand it to her. She smiles and wipes her eyes. I give her another hug and kiss and Sophie comes slowly over and jumps up on her leg- giving her hand a kiss.

"There. Now we both have a piece of the goodest good boy that ever was." Iggy and Martin mouth 'thank you' and the kids just give me hugs. I feel a little better. Not by much, but just enough to get me up and moving with my day.

They leave shortly after and I head upstairs to take a shower. Everywhere I go, Sophie is right there beside me. She's never been without Bent. She's never had a moment alone. And for the passed few months- neither have I. It's weird not having my big hairy goofy boy following me around or acting like a fool- jumping from couch to couch and zooming around the house- skipping on his furry paws a bit. It'll never be the same without him. That's one less being looking out for me. Looking to protect me and keep me happy and safe. One less comforting body to pull me from my living nightmares. I don't know if I'll ever be as happy as I was without him here and looking down at Sophie, sadly laying at my feet as I undress- I know she'll never be the same again either.